Mabel forced me into better clothes than my own, ones without the rips and stains that adorned my normal garments: skinny jeans and a black T-shirt, with dark grey converses on my feet and a black beanie on my head. I looked okay, better than normal, but it couldn't change the way I felt inside. Who I truly loved.
"You ready, Dipdip?" Mabel called from downstairs, over the muffled laughter of her friends.
I felt like jumping out the window and moving to Canada so I didn't have to go to that stupid club. But I couldn't do that to Mabel, even though I was still really mad at her. I could never leave her all alone. I sighed, grabbed my wallet and rushed downstairs.
"Woah, Mabel, Dipper looks HOT!" Grenda yelled as I arrived in the hallway, damaging our eardrums. Mabel giggled and adjusted my hat as I stood, bored, awkward and wishing I was was in hell so I could be with Bill.
And, even if Bill wasn't there, hell would still be a better alternative to this.
"I really appreciate you doing this Dipper," Mabel whispered in my ear as we got in the car. She was wearing a short, hot pink, sequinned dress and a small, sincere smile on her face. She was only doing what she thought was best, the only problem was that she was wrong.
The Hangout was a loud, dark building on the outskirts of town, surrounded by tall oak trees that blew softly in the wind. Some dance song that I hated was blasting out of the club, full volume, making me squirm in disgust. Outside, people were milling about, smoking and kissing vigorously. I didn't belong here.
The girls squealed in delight and rushed onto the smoky, technicoloured dancefloor. I followed them in, eventually ending up at the bar. Instead of drinking, though, I just sat there, alone, praying the night would end soon. A girl sat down next to me, one with shining blonde hair and a tight purple dress that left little to the imagination. Pacifica Northwest.
"One peach and lime daiquiri, please," she told the bartender before glancing in my direction. "Oh, um... Dipper, hi... I haven't seen you in forever, how are you?"
"Fine, I guess," I lied, because I definitely didn't want to talk to her about my problems.
"Oh, yeah, same..." she replied awkwardly, probably wondering how to get away from me without sounding rude. "So, are you going to sit here alone all night, or do you wanna dance with me?"
She held out her hand to me hopefully. I honestly couldn't believe she thought there was a chance I would take it. I looked down at her perfectly manicured fingernails, bemused, before catching sight of her small, hopeful smile. She wanted us to make up, and to have that easy relationship everybody seemed to want me to have. No chance.
"We broke up, okay?" I told her. "And we're not getting back together any time soon."
"What's the big deal, Dip?"
"WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL? YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH GIDEON FUCKING GLEEFUL!"
I was yelling at the top of my lungs. Many people had turned around to watch the fight, including Mabel, who I could see a glimpse of through the bustling crowd, her lipstick-stained mouth hanging open. I knew what she wanted: me and Pacifica back together, once again. Nice and safe and predictable. But it wasn't who I was, and I couldn't pretend like I did before.
"I'm willing to try again, Dipper!" She cried, clinging onto my wrist too tightly. " I want us to work out somehow! Why can't you try this? Why? I thought you loved me once, why can't you love me again?"
"If I go with you now, I'm lying to myself and you, and that's not fair for either of us. I can't love you like I did before, because I've changed, and I love someone else. And I can never love you now because of them. Now, let me go, because I don't want to hurt you like you hurt me."
Immediately, she let me go, and a waterfall of tears ran down my face as I sped out of the door, not looking back as I bumped into various teens who were milling around the entrance. They yelled and cursed in my direction, but I didn't care about them. I had too much to think about.
***
Longest chapter yet!! I just realised I've been doing some dipcifica (kinda) in this chapter and BillDip hasn't even started yet! Wow... So yeah, Pacifica and Gideon! Dipper swearing! Clubbing! Peach and lime daiquiris (panic! at the disco reference)! Love you guys,
Em xx
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The Puppeteer (BillDip)
FanfictionDipper Pines awakens in the night, sweating, after a dream about a certain demon... But Bill is gone, he tells himself, fake reassurance. And failing. Deep down, he knows Bill is not a problem anymore, but something, somehow, is making Bill stick ar...