Chapter 4 The present

                                    

                                          
Waking up to my reality is always hard, waking up to this at 4 am is even harder. At least I did not have any nightmares. For the first time in a while I actually had a peaceful night's sleep. I had a dream about me and My cousins playing with our neighbors. I miss them so much. Maybe I should try contacting them again, I am sure they would finally come get me if they knew about Michael and Jack. I still do not understand why they did not want me to go live with them after dad died. They practically raised me. I think uncle Joe was more like a father to me than my dad was, even when he was still alive. When me and my dad moved to Washington, five years ago, my dad promised me that we would visit them every month. It was the first time I was going to be without them. I have not seen them since dad got deployed, it was a few months after we moved to D.C. When his convoy got ambushed I never even heard from them. Just one short letter. The worst part was when they did not show at his funeral. It was just me and crazy aunt Sally, dad's stepsister. When social services told me I was going to live with her instead of uncle Joe and aunt Ellie I could not believe it. I kept thinking it was just a misunderstanding, until aunt Sal abandoned me here at Michael's house. Reality sunk in real fast after his first episode. I was twelve and he was so drunk he could not even remember his own name. He asked me to get him another beer out of the fridge but I was so nervous I accidentally spilled some of it on him and the monster was released. He beat me up so bad that I thought I was going to pass out. It was the first time anyone had ever hit me. I remember thinking I was going to die that night. Turns out my body can withstand a lot more punches. A lot more. These days I am so used to getting smacked around and hiding my bruises that it feels weird not having to worry about bruises today. No makeup needed to cover anything up, no long sleeve shirts in the middle of the summer. Shit, this is bad. They have never left me alone this long. This can only mean one thing- a storm is brewing. I need to be extra careful the next few days. One of them are going to snap soon. I wish it would just happen so we can get it over with because I hate the anticipation. I should probably get up. If I am late I will have to deal with Jack before school. I quickly make my bed and run to the bathroom downstairs. When I turn on the shower I realize that the water is ice cold. Jack left the geyser off again! He always shuts it off to save electricity, but sometimes he would purposely leave it off so I would have to take a cold shower in the morning. It is all part of his mind games. By the time I am done washing my hair I am literally shaking from the cold. I quickly towel-dry my hair and pull my shirt on. After finishing in the bathroom I peek out the door to make sure the coast is clear. I sneak back into my room  and grab my sports bag and books before making my way out the window. When I am safe on the ground and on my way to the gas station, I put my earphones in and start to relax with some music. Music is my escape. I sit at the dimly lit table and finish my homework before heading off to the bus station. When I arrive at the stop, the bus is already there but I decide to wait for Leah and rather catch a ride with her today. She always drives past the bus stop incase I want a lift, it is on her way to school anyway. She is late, like always. "Kate! Kate! I swear I am going to confiscate your earphones if you don't stop listing to them that loud," Leah yells from her car. "You wouldn't dare!" I confidently challenge her. She thinks I am damaging my ears by listening to my music this loud, I probably am. When I get in the car she turns up the music and I am sure it is worse than my own music blasting in my ears, because now our music is blasting for the world to hear. I can see she is trying really hard to contain her excitement about something, but I silently wait for her to reveal whatever news she has to reveal. "My mom convinced Michael to let you stay over at our house this weekend!" She squeals. Suddenly my weekend sounds more appealing. "Lee, are you serious? You know this won't be a funny joke," I say skeptically. "I'm serious. She told him we have a school project that needs to be done by Monday. I kind of told her about your anxiety attack." Leah's parents are really cool. Her mom knows that I do not like staying with Michael, but that is all she knows. Leah is an only child and they spoil her a lot. Her parents were really young when they had her and decided to name her after their favorite Star Wars character, princess Leia. I like them, they are kind of funny and a bit weird but really cool. "Why did you tell her?" I ask frightened. "I had to. I was scared and needed someone to confide in. She doesn't know about the physical abuse, just the fact that Jack is an asshole who still behaves like a child. She says that she has always thought that there is something sketchy about Michael. She thinks it is plain bullying and she won't intervene unless you ask her to but I can't guarantee his safety from my mom at the moment," Leah assures me. "I guess I can understand that. Lets just forget about all the drama and enjoy our girls weekend," I smile back at her. "Yeah baby! We are going to the party tonight, after our match," she says in that voice that means there will be no changing her mind. We created our own off-season-soccer-league, there is only three teams and they consist of seven players each but it is a lot of fun and really good practice for the upcoming season because some of the boys have joined in. "Fine" I give in, like I used to do with Emma and Alice. I wonder what they are like now, if they are still best friends? I will see them again, even if I have to find them just to ask them why they abandoned me. I need to know why Christian did not even try to find me and why they did not attend dad's funeral. I need to know what happened to my once happy family. Leah pulls into the school parking lot just in time for us to hear the warning bell ring and my stomach drops. I can not be late for class. If I am late they will call my guardian and Michael will punish me until the end of time. I am not sure I will survive his wrath, especially if he has a legitimate reason to punish me. Leah sees the panic on my face and quickly reassures me that we will be fine. She grabs my hand and we start jogging down the almost empty hall. When we round the corner to our classroom I see the open door and my heart slows down again. The teacher is not here yet. Thank God for small mercies. Leah winks at me as we make our way to our seats at the back. When we are finally seated the teacher stumbles through the door. He is one of my favorites. "I told you we wouldn't be late," Kate whispers to me. I give her a small smile before focussing my attention to the front of the class. My grades are equally as important as my soccer season if I want a scholarship to college.