Thirty Four

                                    

                                          
Seeds of Doubt 
The rain poured against the windows of Yong's home, creating distorted shadows across the the large living room. Smoke hung heavy in the air, flowing lazily from Jian's joint as he leaned back in his chair, feet propped up on the edge of the coffee table. Sebastian was sat next to him, legs crossed and head thrown back with his eyes close, half asleep. Tatum was cherishing a glass  of bourbon, while Hendrix played absently with a knife, its blade reflecting the low light of the overhead lamp. Jude, as usual, sat a little apart from the others, his expression brooding as he swirled his beer.
Yong sat in the corner, nursing his own glass of whiskey in silence. His leg throbbed painfully, a reminder of Julian's wrath, but that wasn't what botherin him. His thoughts were somewhere else, with someone else. With someone who didn't want his thoughts.
"Man, you look like hell," Jian said, exhaling a plume of smoke. "When's the last time you slept, man"
"Don't worry about me," Yong muttered, his voice clipped as he reached over for a puff of his joint.
Tatum, ever the peacemaker, tried to lighten the mood. "Come on, Jian. You know Yong's too busy sheming to sleep. Probably thinking about whose life he wants to ruin next."
A few chuckles rippled through the group, but Jude remained silent, his eyes locked on Yong with a quiet intensity. Yong ignored him, pretending not to notice, but the weight of Jude's gaze was suffocating.
"So, what's the plan now?" Hendrix asked, flipping the knife with practiced ease. "We sticking to business as usual, or are we burning the witch at the stake?"
Yong didn't respond immediately. He swirled the liquid in his glass, his mind racing. Business as usual. The words felt foreign now. There was nothing usual about anything anymore. Not with Ezra in the picture. He wanted her safe, he didn't want to risk Ezra getting hurt in the crossfire of his and Julian's fight for power. 
"Same as always," he finally said, his tone flat. "We do the job, we get paid. End of story."
Jian snorted. "Yeah, except it's not the end of the story, is it? Not with her around.Doing the job would include gettind rid of her."
The air in the room shifted. Sebastian opened his eyes and shot Jian a warning glance, but it was too late. The words were out, and the tension was palpable.
"And what,per say, would you mean by that Jian?" Yong asked, his voice low.
"Just saying, Yong" Jian replied, holding up his hands in mock surrender. "You've been distracted. Unlike yourself. That's all."
"Distracted?" Yong repeated, his tone dangerous.
"Look, dn't take it personally," Jian said, leaning forward, very clearly intoxicated by the joint he had been smoking. "We get it. She's under your protection. But maybe it's time to ask yourself if she's worth all this."
"Enough," Sebastian interjected, his voice firm. It didn't happen often, but every once in a while he had to remind everybody who was really in charge here. Well, they worked for Julian, that much was clear. But truth be told, at least their little organisation, was owned by Sebastian's father but was inherited by Sebastian when he was shot and killed. Sebastian took responsbility as heir to the business and also the oldest amongst his friends and coworkers. However, he didn't have a natural for this line of work. Yong did and he was like a second son to Sebastian's father. And, Sebastian being ever loyal to his late father, had no problem allowing Yong to take the reigns because he knew that was what was right. But again, sometimes these boys needed a reminder of who their senior was.  "We're supposed to be decompressing, not starting fight.Especially not amongst ourselves."
But the damage was done. Jude, who had been silent until now, finally spoke, his voice cutting through the tension like a blade. "Jian's not wrong, though."
Yong's eyes snapped to Jude, his jaw tightening. "Jude?" He was surprised his interjection. Yong knew Jude disagreed with his actions but he had always had his back. 
Jude leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees. Drunk. "It's funny. Really, it is. You're always talking about loyalty, about protecting what's yours. But it seems like the only thing you're protecting these days is her.. "
The room went deathly silent. Even Jian, who loved stirring the pot, looked uncomfortable.
"You want to rethink that sentence?" Yong said, his voice cold.
"Why?" Jude shot back, his tone laced with venom. "Because it's true? You've been off your game, Yong. You almost got us all killed last time. For what? To keep her happy?"
"Your next words better be worth it. They may be your last." Yong growled, rising to his feet. The movement sent a jolt of pain through his leg, but he ignored it.
Jude stood as well, his drink forgotten on the table. "Why should I? You think none of us see it? You're not doing this for her or us. You're doing it for you. Admit it, Yong. You don't want her safe. You want her for yourself."
The accusation hung in the air like a thunderclap. Yong lunged before he could think better of it, his fist connecting with Jude's jaw. The sound of the impact echoed through the room, and the others sprang into action, pulling them apart.
"Enough!" Sebastian shouted, stepping between them. "Both of you, stop it!"
Jude wiped the blood from his mouth, a smirk playing on his lips despite the swelling. "That's it, huh? The great and mighty Yong, losing his cool over a girl." He slurred. 
Yong's chest heaved as he glared at Jude, his fists clenched at his sides. "You don't know what the hell you're talking about." He sighed rubbing his temples. 'You're drunk, you don't know what you're saying." He said. 
"Don't I?" Jude shot back. "You think you're keeping her safe, but you're just making us all targets. Maybe you should let someone else—"
"Get out," Yong interrupted, his voice deadly calm.He need Jude to leave or the next thing to hit his body would be a bullet. 
"What?"
"I said get out," Yong repeated, pointing toward the door. "Now."
Jude hesitated for a moment, then grabbed his jacket and stormed out, slamming the door behind him. The silence that followed was deafening.
***
Yong sat alone in his room, the rain still beating against the windows. His knuckles were raw, his leg ached, and his head was pounding, but none of it mattered. All he could think about were Jude's words.
You don't want her safe. You want her for yourself.
He poured himself another drink, his hands trembling slightly. He hated Jude for saying it, but what he hated more was the truth buried in the accusation.
He thought of Ezra; her defiance, her vulnerability, the way she looked at him with equal parts hatred and something else he couldn't define. He hated how much she occupied his thoughts, how much he wanted her to understand him. To see him.
"You're losing it," he muttered to himself, downing the drink in one gulp.
But no matter how much he tried to convince himself otherwise, he couldn't shake the feeling that Jude was right. And that scared him.
A/N: finally a new chapter, please please please guys comment something and vote it really motivates me to lkeep writing :)