XVI

                                    

                                          

The feeling of Rodrick's hand around Eli's wrist was not going away, even though he let go of it when they got into his van, which was at least five minutes ago. They left the school parking lot, almost running over some Sophomore girl, which made Rodrick laugh. Was he in the right mind?
Behind the window, except for the usual houses and colorful, fall trees, Eli already saw some Christmas decorations. Damn, some people really couldn't wait for that holiday. It was still November.
"Stop biting your nails" that made Eli flinch, waking up from his dark thoughts, where he was already planning moving schools. Not that it was an option, but he wanted to be prepared just in case. He blushed, taking the hand away from his mouth. They pulled up to a KFC drive-thru.
"Do you want something?" Rodrick asked, but the reply he got was just a shake of the head. "Hey, can I get large fries, medium coke, and that sweet thing with apple..." he paid for everything, found a parking spot, and handed Eli the apple turnover.
"No, thanks" the boy shook his head again. He was too stressed to eat.
"It's warm" Rodrick tried to convince him "It'll make you feel better, I promise" seeing Eli like this, turning into a shadow of himself in less than two hours, was painful. To his relief, the suit boy took it, and even tried to take a tiny bite.
They sat in the van quietly, only some of Rodrick's playlists playing as a background sound.
"Do you need anything?" Eli didn't know how to respond to that. Everything he truly, deeply wanted was out of reach for him right now.
"I don't know" it seemed like shaking his head was all that was left for him.
"I won't let anyone pick on you" Rodrick promised "You're too adorable to be bullied" he couldn't believe, but Eli smirked. It was a sad smirk, but it appeared.
"Am I?" The boy met Rodrick's eyes with his tired ones. It was hard to tell if his question was sarcastic or completely serious, and the answer was the same.
"You are" there was a moment of silence after that statement. They both needed to think about what it actually meant.
◈◈◈
It turned out that a simple snack at KFC was not the end of Rodrick's plan. As the bad boy character he created himself to be, of course he knew some places they could go to have privacy and a nice view. What he chose for today was the rooftop of an abandoned apartment building. Well, it wasn't completely abandoned, some people still lived there, but it was quite old, and it was easy to get in. And that's what they did. Holding Eli's hand, Rodrick pulled him up the emergency stairs that were on the outside, and they got to the top.
"Come on, it's not that scary" Rodrick chuckled, trying to convince Eli to sit next to him, with his legs swinging down in the air.
"It is" Eli was stubborn, so he was sitting with his back to the void, his feet safely on the rooftop. Rodrick rolled his eyes with a chuckle, putting his hand behind his back for support. His fingers touched Eli's. He didn't back away.
"How are you feeling?" he asked after a moment of silence. Fall wind messing with his dark hair, making it get into his eyes, but trying to move it away was pointless.
"Better, I guess" Eli sighed, his fingers moving slightly, trying to shyly intertwine with Rodrick's, making it look like an accident.
"You guess?"
"I mean, it just feels... Less panicky"
"Good" Rodrick moved his hand as well, making the grip of his fingers firm. They were not looking at each other. Rodrick was staring into the colorful leaves on the trees five floors below, while Eli was staring at the gray rooftop and some trash that was on it.
"But..." the suit boy started slowly. "I don't see a future in school anymore" another sigh left his pale lips. Did he see any future at all? People wouldn't see him as a boy anyway. He would be just that weird kid who tries to be a boy.
"Because you're looking at the wrong aspects of it" Rodrick squeezed the cold hand he was holding "I mean, some people will be dicks, sure. But if they decide to leave you, it's their loss. They would do so even if you came out to them on your terms" The wind seemed to become less intense, but their cheeks kept being red, no matter that the chill was gone.
"Come on" Rodrick said once more "Look at the better side" He tugged on Eli's sleeve, convincing him to turn around. Hesitantly, he finally let his legs also swing in the air, while he watched the city in the fall, holding tightly onto Rodrick's hand.