Chapter 1

                                    

                                          
Jay considered himself lucky. 
He grew up with two loving parents, despite the fact they weren't his biological family, and had a somewhat warm and safe roof over his head. Although he may not have had the best childhood compared to most other children in the world - living in the middle of the Sea of Sands, far from any other people his age, and far from any schools, was difficult - he at least had more than what his friends had. It was mostly just the parent part really. 
And that's why he considered himself lucky. Because even though he didn't have the luxury things his friends had, he was at least grateful to have two people who cared for him deeply. Two people who saw him as perfect in their eyes. His relationship with them was perfect . Too perfect.
Whenever Jay found himself thinking about how lucky he was compared to his friends, that's the only thing he really thought about. Although he'd gotten lucky in the family department, there were still parts of his life he wished he could change. Parts of his life he realised he wasn't lucky in at all, especially when it came to himself. 
There wasn't really anything wrong with him, of course not, but that constant sound of his parents telling him how perfect he was, how amazing and talented and funny he was, really only screwed him over in the end.
Not being around many people his age growing up meant he didn't have those peers to tell him when he wasn't perfect. Instead, he was thrown in at the deep end, moving in with three other boys his age that he didn't know. He'd never met any other teenagers before. He'd never had friends before. It was a humbling experience to say the least because not only was everything his parents had told him he was perfect for were actually his fatal flaws, but he was thrown into the mix of three boys that were so much better than him.
Jay often told himself they were just different and everyone had different qualities. It didn't necessarily mean Jay sucked.
As time went on, that little reassuring voice in the back of his mind died down.
Although Kai was hot-headed, he was caring and funny. Charm was one of his biggest characteristics too - something Jay seemed to lack. Kai was liked by everyone, including the ninja team fans, but he'd never seem to get any hate or snarky comments from anyone within the team either. He got on with everyone so well. 
Zane was a walking computer, he was already perfect. And besides, changing things about himself when something was wrong was probably easy. When he joined the team, he was already kind and caring, and there was something about his physique that was so drawing. It was so simple to like Zane.
And Cole. Cole was everything Jay wasn't .
All the things Jay thought were his best qualities ended up being his worst, and ended up being what drove everyone away. His parents always told him that his loudness, excitable body language, and unique humour were what made him so special and likeable. He stuck to that for most of his childhood. It wasn't like he could control his naturally joyful personality. Growing up so outgoing made him feel better about meeting these three guys, thinking they'd all be so similar and that he'd be so easily likeable. Oh, how he was wrong.
None of them seemed to want to be around him at first. Zane and Cole were quiet and mostly stuck to themselves, not that it was a problem, but it definitely wasn't what Jay had prepared himself for. They soon loosened up when Kai joined the team, but even after years and years of knowing each other - becoming a close family - none of them really seemed to enjoy Jay's company as much as everyone else's. 
His loudness was annoying. His excitable body language was draining. His 'unique humour' was just unfunny and slightly embarrassing. 
But in the end, it clearly became bearable. Nya seemed to enjoy his company more, but even then, it still felt like he was too much for her.