Illusions

                                    

                                          
"...But believe me
I'm not trying to deceive you
I promise falling for me
won't be a mistake..."
                          
Harry's P.O.V
                          
After singing those words all day long on a stage anyone could tell you that I've had enough, but no one knows better than my wife, and to be perfectly honest I don't know how she puts up with it. It's been three years since 'FOUR' came out and to be honest it's in such a dark place of my life that I don't really miss it. That year of touring for the 'On the Road Again Tour' was hell. Everything went wrong. We left the U.K with a vision that disappeared when Zayn left One Direction in March of 2015. We had performed in Hong Kong and were about to leave for Africa when he announced that he was quitting to be normal. I remember at the time scoffing thinking, 'Who wants to be normal, this is the life.' But by July of that same year my priorities had changed as things got worse. 
                          
First I lost my temper on tour at Liam and Louis and the only one who would talk to me for three weeks straight was Niall. But in my defence Liam and Louis had been bad-mouthing Zayn for almost a month at this stage and I accused them of being jealous which they denied but I knew it was true so I called them on it and I got snubbed for three weeks. At the time I remember feeling let down and dejected by people who I had known for years and we were meant to be friends. Yeah I understood that Zayn left but he wasn't bound to us, he wanted out so he left. At the time of the snubbing my life drastically changed, I began to drink heavily and party to all hours of the night no matter where we were. Everyone tried to talk to me but I only listened to Niall who understood how I felt because when we first started out he got homesick a lot and I helped him. 
                          
Then in December of that year things took a drastic change, I had become depressed and a recluse from life. Mainly my own, I drank for release and partied hoping to numb the pain and there weren't many days that I wasn't photographed leaving drunk. The twentieth of December 2014 was when life changed. "Look Harry, you can't keep doing this..." he claimed that night but I just tossed his comment aside and went out anyway. Stepping out across the street in London that night then became the worst mistake I've ever made. I happened to bump into my ex-girlfriend Taylor Swift and her new boyfriend Calvin Harris which got me mad. I knew that they were dating but did they have to be here in London rubbing it in my face. I was headed for the bar when I saw it, a dark blonde haired man making out with a red head in a dark corner of the bar. There weren't many people and when I looked around and saw no sign of Taylor I assumed that I was wrong and it wasn't Calvin. I was about to order a whisky on the rocks when I heard a deafening slap. Usually not one for gossip I turned and my eyes nearly bulged out of my head when I saw a disheartened Taylor Swift walking towards me, and a red faced Calvin Harris standing next to the red head girl and my heart broke. There was something about the look in her eye that told me her walls of security were about to go back up and suddenly without thinking I stood and followed her from the bar. For the first time in almost six months I left a bar without drinking something. 
                          
"Hey, Taylor wait up." I called out to her retreating back. She turned to face me and her eyes just showed more hurt. "What do you want Harry, as you saw I'm having a rough night." I looked at her and knew that for once we were on the same page. "I get it. I'm having a rough six months..." I trailed off quietly at the end but her exceptional hearing heard me. "What?" she questioned turning to face me once more, I was a bit shocked but shook my head to say, 'don't worry' but she kept looking at me so I took a deep breath and explained. She listened closely and in the darkened London Street, where no paparazzi were I saw her face lighten and her eyes melt a little bit and then the walls tumbled. My problems had given her an excuse not to think about what had just happened and although I was upset at myself I felt better for having made her feel okay. "...so that's practically my last six months." I stated as she looked at me. "Oh Harry, that sounds awful. I can't believe they ignored you. I heard about Zayn but figured you wouldn't want to hear from me..." I jumped in and spoke over her. 
"Are you kidding me," she looked at me. "All I've ever wanted since you left our holiday was for you to call me." She looked at me shocked and I moved a bit closer. "I'm going to tell you something that you probably don't want to hear so I'm giving you the chance to leave." I state closing my eyes to let her run but when I open them she's still there. She smiles at me. "I'm not leaving Harry. What is it?" I take a deep breath and then state. "Taylor, I love you." Her eyes widen in shock.
"Really?" she questions. I was a bit shocked I thought that I'd be getting slapped by now but I wasn't, she was talking to me. I nodded and looked down and mentally slapped myself. 'For god sakes Harry she just broke up with toolbox Harris, give the woman some space.'