What happened? (McNawayer angst)

                                    

                                          
T/w: panic attacks and small mention of overdosing 
-Veronica Sawyer's pov-
I knew I should get therapy after all that habit this year however I can't help but feel like therapy is useless and I have to support my girlfriend, Heather McNamara. She went through a lot since the begining and I don't want her to overdose herself again like last time. Seeing those cuts on her legs and seeing my girlfriend sad and depressed pains me, I want to see her happy. I sat on the couch as the memories of J.D rushed back to my head, it was like J.D was in the same room as me. I could feel my heart beating a mile per hour, my chest rising up slowly but heavily, my body trembling slightly. He can't be here, make it stop. Make them- suddenly, I received a call from Heather McNamara which thankfully made me stop thinking about J.D. I sighed softly in relief, at first I was surprised but I calmed down when I saw it was just Heather McNamara. I picked up my phone as a small smile curled up from my lips, she was the only reason why I was alive at this point. 
"Heyh Ronnie! Wanna go on a date on fourth of July? It's to celebrate the independence!"
Oh, time flies by so fast. I forgot it's already about to be the fourth of July and the reminders of Heather McNamara's voice. So sweet, it makes me want to forget about everything in the world and I could spend hours listening to her voice. I quickly snapped back to reality as I shook my head side to side before a nervous chuckle escaped my lips.
"Haha.. y-yeah yeah what time." 
I mumbled softly as I looked down at the floor as I leaned back against the couch, feeling the fabric of the cushions behind me as I sink in slowly. Great, I sound like I don't care about her. C'mon Sawyer! Show some reaction! 
"Well... 7 I pick you up? Okay, bye." 
After that, I quickly shut off my phone. What was that?! You sounded as if you wanted to leave as soon as possible. Goddamn it! Well, at least I got to see the yellow clad Heather this Saturday. Oh Heather McNamara, if only she knew how much I loved her. 
-Heather McNamara pov-
I can't wait, I finally got the courage to ask Ronnie on a date! I know me and Veronica are already dating however I feel like after all the things that happened to her, I can't help but feel like I'll hurt her too or if I'm just some sort of annoyance to her plus, she didn't sound so excited when I asked her. Maybe she's not feeling well or is she getting sick of me and is gonna break up with me?! But we've only been dating for a few months now, yet I feel like she might break up with me. Hopefully I don't do anything wrong... 
What felt like seconds turned to days, it was already the fourth of July, the day where it was my date with Veronica! I wore a black dress that rode above my knees and a black crop top jacket and a golden watch on my right wrist. I waited outside my house as I looked around to see if Veronica was outside or not, fiddling with my thumbs as I pursed my lips every now and then. 
"Ronnie!" 
A small smile curled up from my lips as my eyes lit up with joy, they glistened like the stars in the midnight skies as soon as I saw a familiar face from a distance walking towards me. I immediately rushed towards her in my high heels and I wrapped my arms around her neck as I nuzzled my cheek against her. It's always been like that whenever we met, we rarely had any dates however we did meet each other often in Western Berg however Veronica's presence just brings me a lot of joy even if Veronica doesn't think that, I will. I looked at the blue clad Heather as I could see a small smile curling up from her lips, her short aurbun hair and her beautiful eyes just mesmerized me. I quickly snapped back to reality when I heard her soft calm voice.
"Now, shouldn't we go now?" 
I shook my head side to side and I blinked blankly at Veronica for a while, processing what she said before a big huge smile plastered across my face as if I was a golden retriever.
"Sure!" 
Time slowly passed by, to be honest. It felt as if it was a chore to be there. The atmosphere was awkward and extremely tense as if I could cut it with a knife. I excepted where the two of us would laugh together and go on cute dates however no. Instead we got awkward silence and a few small talks which sucks ass. Yet, I rather spend my time with Veronica than anyone else in Western Berg,since the people I like are dead. Then, it came. The fireworks. The only thing other than hanging out with Veronica that I was anticipating for. Fireworks excited me, not only do they have bright and pretty colours, the sounds of them are relaxing. I sighed softly as I tried to lean my head against Veronica but she shifted away from me as we stood at the floor level where a large amount of people were as people were waiting for the fireworks. I glanced at Veronica from the corner of my eyes to see her looking around before I heard a soft whisper escape her lips.
"Uhm, why are we standing here..?" 
"Sh. Just wait and see." 
I quickly hushed Veronica up, hoping maybe after this we could do a small kiss. She hasn't some anything affectionate in a while so maybe this can hint to her that we could do something. 
- Veronica Sawyer's pov -
I looked around as I tilted my head sideways slightly with curiosity in my eyes,with an eyebrow arched. I wondered why Heather McNamara brought us to this field. There were large crowds surrounding looking up. I didn't know why we were here but at least I have Heather McNamara next to me. But then. That was when I heard. These sounds, no. They can't be. I stood rooted to the ground as if I was a frozen statue,unable to move as my eyes widened at the sounds of banging. The memories. They're coming back. Did, did Heather McNamara told me to come here to be reminded of. this?! I mean I told her about all the crazy shit that happened to me before and she knows it. My eyes widened as my chest rose up and down with my breathing being shaky. Calm down. Calm. Down. Please. Not in front of her.
- Heather McNamara's pov -
I watched as the fireworks banged, the pretty colours coming and bursting into the air. It was so mesmerizing, then I noticed Veronica next to me. Something about her seems... Off. I tilted my head sideways slightly with curiosity in my eyes as I arched an eyebrow. She was trembling, she wasn't even making any sounds. I slowly and hesitantly went to touch her shoulder and immediately, she shoved me away. My eyes widened at her actions. This wasn't the usual Veronica I knew, the one I knew was kind smart and even more than that. I blinked blankly as I tried to form words.
"Ronni-" 
"Don't come near me." 
Those words came out of Veronica's mouth as if she was threatening me, then she curled up in a ball. There were a lot of people and it was extremely loud so people didn't pay attention to us. A soft groan escaped my lips, this is the worst date I've ever went on and Veronica isn't even helping.
"Ronnie, what's going on-" 
Before I knew, Veronica ran off. Leaving me behind in the crowds.
...
What happened?
-1350 words-
A/n: HEYYY IM BACK ALSO I SAW THIS NEW HEATHERS ONE SHOT AND THEY POST SO FREQUENTLY LIKE GIRLIE HOW DO YOU POST THAT FAST 😨😨 but anyway I saw this suggestion TYSM and I loved it but NO HAPPY ENDING FOR Y'ALL JUST SADNESS I love doomed Yuri even if this isn't doomed Yuri. If you couldn't tell I kinda gave up on the ending