CHAPTER 1

                                    

                                          
CHAPTER ONE
Harlow


Sometimes I feel cursed.
Okay, well, not cursed exactly. But I've had my share of challenges in the nineteen years I've been on this planet. Well-meaning people—usually adults—have always told me to be thankful for my hardships. It makes you stronger. More capable. Independent.
I wish all that were true. Really, the events that have shaped my life just settle like silt inside me, tainting every thought, every action. Until I'm convinced misfortune has been braided into my DNA.
Generational trauma, isn't that what they call it?
I dig my toes into the wet sand and look out at the Pacific Ocean. It's hard to feel cursed here, though. Malibu is a magical place, soaked in sunshine, with a surprising small-town feel. But its best quality is how far it is from Fresno. From home. From the events of last year.
The sharp wind whips through my hair and stings my cheeks. My best friend, Talia, and I wandered down to the beach hours ago after we'd unpacked our boxes and set up our dorm rooms.
Talia called me crazy when I waded into the frigid water, dunking my head under the salty waves like some kind of baptism. Maybe it was a type of cleansing. The ghosts of my past washing away with the tide.
If only forgetting were so easy.
"Hey, look what I found!"
I turn to see Talia walk up to me with something cradled in her palm. It's a piece of green sea glass. "It was probably a beer bottle or something originally."
Picking it up, I angle it toward the fading sunlight, looking at it from different angles, admiring its beauty. The power of the ocean is wild—transforming an ordinary beer bottle into something so beautiful. I wonder if it has the power to transform me, too. "What are you going to do with it?"
Talia shrugs. "Turn it into a necklace or something, maybe."
Another gust of ocean Taliaze whips through me, and my teeth start chattering. "It's almost sunset. We should head back to the residence hall."
Exeter University West—one of the West Coast's most prestigious colleges—is right on the beach. When Talia and I applied last year, it was a long shot. A pipe dream. We both have decent grades, but nothing spectacular. So, months later, when we were both accepted, it felt like a miracle. Then when I scored a full scholarship, I finally started to believe my luck was changing.
Exeter is the escape I've been desperate for. A fresh start.
I look down the length of the beach and see a huge Victorian mansion perched on a cliff, overlooking the ocean. I noticed it when we first got to campus a couple of days ago. It's hard to miss. The giant Gothic structure is painted a dark, crimson red with navy blue trim, and ornate woodwork that makes it look out of place on a modern college campus. I was probably here first, though, and the university just encroached gradually until the house and grounds were consumed by the sprawling campus.
It's a creepy-looking house, though. No lie.
"Our residence hall is right on the other side of that weird house," I say.
"Okay, let's go," Talia says, her bottom lip quivering. "I'm turning into a brine-flavored popsicle."
The sharp wind continues to cut through us as we walk along the sand, getting dark quickly, and we're two girls walking alone, so I'm on full alert—glancing behind us, my hand resting on the small stun gun tucked into my front pocket.
But the beach is empty—which is surprising, considering the amount of students on campus. It rained a little earlier, and it's freezing, so maybe that's why no one is here. But cold or not, there would still be a couple of people out here, at least, right?