Chapter 13- Talk

                                    

                                          
⚠️TW: Mentions of Anorexia
Me, Lizzie and Scarlett are all lying in bed together, watching a movie whilst cuddled up in each other's arms. It's one of my favourite things to do as a way to just relax after a stressful day at school, I love to just spend time with them, even if we're not even doing anything. 
I can almost hear Aurora's words of reassurance in my mind as I try to get the courage to talk to them both about my eating. I've never really talked about it in front of anybody except Aurora, I've always been too scared to say anything. 
But I think I'll be alright. They're the most comforting and understanding people I've ever met, and I feel like I'm ready to open up a little more to them. 
I tap Scarlett on the shoulder and she turns to me with a soft smile, "What's up, sweetheart?"
"Do you think we can pause the movie for a few moments?" I ask slowly, "I..want to talk to you both about something."
She nods before pausing a movie, all three of us sitting up properly so that I can talk to them. My heart is beating rapidly in my chest, I don't even know how I'm meant to say it to them. 
"Are you alright, darling?" Lizzie asks, taking my hand softly and rubbing her thumb over my skin. 
I nod, "I just wanted to talk to you both about something. I've been wanting to say it for a while but I didn't really know how to."
They both nod, which gives me a little more confidence as I see their comforting smiles. 
"I don't know whether you would've noticed or not but," I take a deep breath, "I have anorexia..and I sort of struggle quite a lot with eating. I'm doing a lot better than I was a few years ago but it can still be quite difficult. And I think I just sort of wanted you to know.."
"We really appreciate you telling us that, my love." Scarlett says in a comforting voice, "I know that wouldn't have been easy and I'm really proud of you for being able to talk about it."
I let out a shaky breath, nodding with a small smile. The comforting look on their faces makes this so much easier because I know that I can trust them. I know that they will make me feel safe. 
"We're both here for you, please remember that, sweetheart." Lizzie tells me softly, "If you're ever struggling to eat or having a rough day, we're always going to be there for you. You're not alone."
The last sentence makes me tear up, it's been ages since I truly felt like somebody cared for me like this. 
"Come here, baby." Scarlett whispers, opening her arms out so that I can cuddle up in between the both of them. 
I bury my head in her chest, feeling Lizzie's arms wrap around me from behind as she presses a soft kiss on my cheek. I feel so safe with them, it's like nothing bad can happen whilst I'm in their arms. They're absolutely perfect. 
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I can't sleep. I don't know what the time is, but I'm not tired at all, I'm wide awake.
I'm sitting on the windowsill in their bedroom, staring up at the night sky as I try to count all of the stars I can see. I don't want to wake my girlfriends up because it's really late, so I'm just trying to do something to pass the time until I'm tired. 
I jump as I hear the rustling of the bed sheets, the sudden noise making me flinch. I turn my head slowly to see Lizzie climbing out of bed, trying not to wake Scarlett up before walking over to me. 
"It's two in the morning, darling. You alright?" She whispers, brushing a strand of hair out of my face and tucking it behind my ear. 
"I can't sleep- I've tried everything."
"You need to let your pretty body rest, baby." She says softly, "Come on, let's get you back into bed."
She holds out her hand and I take it, climbing off the windowsill and shutting the curtains. We quietly get back into bed so that we don't wake up Scarlett, Lizzie laying on the outside so that I can lay in between them. 
"What do you think would help you sleep, my love?" Lizzie whispers, turning to face me. 
"Hold me. Please." I breathe out, "I know it's embarrassing but you make me feel so safe."
"It's not embarrassing, sweetheart." She smiles, "All you have to do is ask, I would hold you all day, every day if I could."
She wraps her arms around me as I face Scarlett, smiling at her soft features as she sleeps. Lizzie presses a soft kiss on my head, her arms settling around my waist as she holds me close. 
Suddenly, Scarlett stretches a little before moving closer towards me, giving me a soft smile before she closes her eyes again. She wraps her hands around my body as well, holding Lizzie's hands as we all rest together. 
I've never felt more safe than I do in their arms. 
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Another double post since the chapters are shorter than usual! Hope everyone is enjoying the book so far ❤