𝙘𝙝𝙖𝙥𝙩𝙚𝙧 𝙚𝙞𝙜𝙝𝙩𝙮 𝙨𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙣, pedri

                                    

                                          
❝ drunk on this pain. ❞
⇄ ◃◃ ⅠⅠ ▹▹ ↻
'It's a wonderful life.' They said. Yeah, I don't find anything about it slightly wonderful.
I was in the building just trying to at least apologize to my sister. I may have lost Olive forever, but I will never forgive myself if I lose Isabel.
Isabel is the one person I could aways count on. She's my person, my sister, my only family. I would die before letting her go.
I may get over the fact that I lost Olive over some bullshit that is myself, I'll never get over her, but I'll deal with it.
But losing the person I grew up with, that I basically raised myself, and watched her become the person she is, that's not something I will never tolerate.
I knocked on Pablo's door when I arrived and he was the one to open. As much as he's been trying to be around with me and support me, I still know that he too is mad at me. And I don't blame him.
"Here to punch anyone else?" He retorted, leaning on the door when he saw me. I tried to apologize and he pointed out that the apology shouldn't be pointed at me and it's clear who it should be to. Which is something I should really do but can't bring myself to. 
When I asked about where Isabel was, he informed me she'd gone to bed, after her long day of recording and rehearsing.
"I need to see her." I basically begged him.
"Try teleporting into her dreams because waking her up is not an option." He answered. 
I didn't insist, knowing he was right. It's around eleven pm, if Isa's asleep at this hour, she must be exhausted to death. And she gets tired easily, I could never wake her up.
Before leaving, Gavi stopped me. "There's someone else you need to apologize to too." He hints, his eyes darting off to upstairs which is now apparently home to Olive's new apartment.
"She doesn't even want to look at me, Gavi." I sighed. He just pressed his lips together and seemed majorly disappointed in me. That made two of us.
He took a step back and was ready to close the door, letting me on my way out. "If she was the one to initiate the break up or whatever you guys consider it was, she'd give an explanation." And those were the last words I'd heard from him before the door sent me going.
I debated for a second whether or not to try my luck, and go make it right? Or at least a little better. But I had no idea what to say.
I don't have an explanation to give because I don't know why it all went down the way it did. I feel like my brain and my heart aren't in sync anymore and expressing myself is out the window.
I don't understand what is happening to me because I know I love her but I don't know why I can't let myself tell it to her.
I decided against it and made my way out. I was already on the edge going down the elevator, so when I stood at the entrance door and saw Olive kissing that stupid Nadim guy's cheek, I just, freaked out.
Which was then followed by me kissing her, yelling at each other, then once again making her cry. The worst is she thinks she's in the alone. As if I don't cry too. I just don't show it.