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•Aria Marino•

        This month is normally bittersweet for me. It's my favorite month of the year but I have never had much cause to celebrate.
        It's finally December. My first December living in Italy since I was 7. I think.
        Yesterday would have been Matteo and I's six month anniversary, but my dad and I spent the entire day watching Christmas movies. and I do mean the entirety of it. We got the Christmas tree from the hallway closet and set it up while watching Christmas movies.
        Dad left for a little over a week but he came back since he was able to get a substitute for his class for until winter vacations start. He said his students probably are stressed anyways so he made their final a few weeks early and made it incredibly easy.
         Anyways, the television is visible from the kitchen so we cooked and ate watching Christmas movies. And that was how we spent the entire day.
        But this morning when I woke up, I felt weird. I had a dream, not a nightmare, which in itself was its own situation. But the dream..
        It was the same dream Papà had told us he had weeks before he passed. That Matteo and I had two twin boys. It was odd.
       But what got me thinking more was that I still consider it a dream. It wasn't just being a mother that was a dream, it was being his wife, having a family with him.
        No matter who he was or what mistakes he made, I still love him. I don't think that will ever change.
         Yes, he hid the truth from me, but he at least had the decency of telling me at some point. I have been thinking of quitting my job for months anyways, and even if I didn't, everyone is right. He is inevitable. He is friends with the freaking president for god sakes.
Not only that but he never did anything bad to me, he never raised his voice at me, he always listened to me, he always made time for me, he never ignored my calls, he just.. He is nothing short of perfection in every goddamn way possible and I cannot believe I even thought of giving that up.
        I think that in the time we have spent apart, I have tried not to love him, because I was hurt that he had lied to me. But I love him, I can't change that.
        And he has never given up on me. Just this morning I woke up to new flowers on my doorstep with a note detailing how much he wishes I was spending my favorite time of the year with him.
        It's not just him either. His entire family has been by both of our sides this entire time. They are constantly over here, and if Aless and Rafi are working then Lia and Sofia are here with Allegra and Laura.
       I just.. I don't know if it was luck or what it was but to end up with them as a family? It's an amazing dream.

•••••

     "What do you guys want for dinner?" I ask the group as they are over here again for dinner.
       My dad is going to be cooking. His cooking is amazing it's actually insane.
       "Wait who is cooking?" Sofia asks.
       "I am," Dad says and everyone smiles.
       "Okay then absolutely anything in the world, thank you," Sofia says, making everyone laugh.
       Dad nods, still laughing. "You got it," he replies, turning to the stove, getting things out of cabinets and the refrigerator, and we just let him do his thing.
       Sofia turns to me, "How are you doing?" she asks, holding my hand in hers.
       I notice this everyone is staring at me and I look at them confused, "Stop looking at me," I say with a laugh, but they don't.
       "She asked you a question!" Luca says as they all wait for me to answer.
       I shrug, "I am doing okay. How is Matteo?" I ask them.
       Their eyes widen in surprise at my question but they all look satisfied. They have all been waiting for this and it's finally happening.
        "He is more insane than ever. Do you want to call him? He should be done with his assignment in about half an hour?" Aless says suggestively, making all of us laugh.
       I smile, "Maybe I will," I reply. Everyone literally starts cheering. Even my dad. There are a few 'finally' yelled as everyone hugs and cheers for what I said. "Hey!" I scold everyone.
       "We're just excited! It's been way too long!" Sofia says, holding me in a hug. Her baby bump is starting to get bigger day by day. I think she's 34 weeks now so she will be giving birth in just a few weeks.
       "Are you going to be leaving Interpol after all?" Aless asks me.
       "I am pretty sure. Even if I do leave, I have enough money saved up for another three months of rent, so I should be fine." I tell him, but they all look at me like I'm dumb.
       Aless shakes his head, "You really think that he is not going to ask you to move in with him as soon as you talk to him?" he asks me, his tone nothing but ridiculous but his words nothing but serious.
       I shrug, smiling at them all when Aless' phone starts ringing. "Oh fuck. It's him." he says, answering the phone and putting it to his ear. His face almost pales, his expression changing in an instant. The phone drops to the counter. "We have to go." he says immediately, gathering his things.
        "Aless, what happened?" I ask him, very worried.
        Aless looks at me, almost scared to speak. "He got shot," he says, making my heart drop.
        All in one day, my work was built up and broken down. My heart racing, my mind doing the same. The one person that had chosen to love me, chosen to care, chosen to fight for me, chosen to give effort, he could be gone.
        As I felt my eyes swell with tears, we were suddenly in a car, racing towards a hospital. Aless said Rafi took him there since he was closer.
       He's in the hospital, he's shot.
       I sit in the hallway chair, my head leaning on Lia's shoulder as my tears deep down my face, past my lips to my chin.

•••••

bye bye

~ elle 🌸

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