Epilogue

                                    

                                          
~~Jaiveer~~
“Urgh!! What is the use of this maths in real life? It does nothing but thrust problems in life.” Robin grumbled while loudly closing our maths books. 
“Papa, tell me. I'm only your favourite son, right? You picked him up from the garbage, right?” Robin asked while pouting and hugging dad. 
Using the fingers of his both hands Robin blared a whistle as soon as a goal was taken in the football match we are watching, “The next match we have to watch it live. I don't know how you're gonna convince, Papa.”
The familiar piercing pain split through my heart and brain making me go cold and numb. I could feel the darkness that started surrounding me. 
“Papa.” At Adiraj's voice I snapped open my eyes. He is staring up at me in confusion. 
“Papa.” He again called bringing my attention back to the ritual we are performing. Following the priest's words, I silently continued with it. 
“What is his name?” The priest asked. 
“Viraj Agni…..”
“Robin.” I cut off Prakash uncle's words, “Robin Sengupta.”
Nodding, the priest continued with the ritual. Today is Robin's death anniversary. We are performing a ritual for providing peace to his soul and also are providing free food to the homeless. As Adiraj is his biological son, it is natural that Adiraj needs to perform this but since he doesn't know anything much, I am accompanying him. Throughout the performing of ritual, I don't even know how I even pulled myself up. I can feel my entire body turning into jelly. I can feel the suffocation. Had I accepted that he is not more? Am I willing to perform these? No. Not at all. But I have no other choice, right? I swallowed back my tears so as not to make Adiraj worried. My little man doesn't know anything. He is thinking that he is just performing some ritual for God. Just like how we do at home. 
When the ritual was finally over, the priest gave us the remnants of Puja to dip them in the water. With Adiraj in one hand and the remnants in the other I walked to the shore of the sea and slowly dropped them in the water. I stood there watching them float away along with the tides. 
This is not a goodbye, Robin. There can never be a goodbye. In one way or the other, please return back to me. I'm still waiting for you. 
“Papa, drown.” Adiraj clapped his little hands while pointing to them. It's been two years since Adiraj uttered his first word. He started speaking though but he couldn't completely frame his sentences. Even then it's alright. He is speaking. That is more than a gift for us. Walking back to the place where the rituals are being held, I handed Adiraj to Dhiraj. 
“Baby, go with chacha and help him with the remaining things, okay?” He nodded, holding Dhiraj’s hand. Now he has grown big, he refuses to be carried around.
“I need some fresh air.” Saying to Dhiraj, I walked out of the building and found Neeraj bhai and Harsh, sitting in the sand, with their feet touching the waves. I walked up to them.   
“When did you sneak out?” I asked, flopping down beside them. 
“In the middle itself.” They answered, staring into the distance.   
“Everything went well?” Harsh asked and I nodded. 
“Are you seriously not gonna opt for surgery?” I asked. The knife stab on his face has turned into a deep scar. It's not that it looks horrendous but considering his fair and smooth skin, it stands out. 
“As long as you guys don't have a problem with it, I don't care. I don't have any intentions to have any other knives and needles near my face.”
“I don't care.” Neeraj bhai answered immediately, “At least now you are looking like a human.”