Chapter 16

                                    

                                          
/The Alphabet of the Heart/
A tap was heard as these black words appeared on the white document Kaede had been looking at. "No..." she mumbled, tapping the delete button several times as she didn't exactly think it was a good title.
/The memory of the heart/
Were the new words Kaede had now used and stared at them. Her teeth pressed down on her lower lip as she read the title several times and then repeated the same as before.
/The..../
Kaede broke in right here, who had propped her elbows on the table and put her face in her hands. A self-hating growl could be heard, which had Kaede annoyed. Why couldn't she even bring herself to write a title? Was it so hard to find something good that fit her life?
Was it perhaps because she was still unsure of herself? That she didn't yet have a male protagonist who fitted the role? Or was it because she didn't want to use something that would be obvious?
"What do I do now...?" Kaede asked herself, taking her hands from her face and looking at the screen of her laptop. Kaede had set the exact template, so all she had to do was write. But what was blocking her? 
She had enough ideas from her own life. She had friends, a family and even a relationship. Unfortunately, he was from a different secondary school, which meant he was of little help to her. Especially as he didn't really fit into this story. Kaese had to reinvent this male part from scratch. Was that perhaps the reason?
Kaede had the motivation to write. If she wanted to, she could just start writing. But this title simply stopped her. "Hm...would Chika think of something?" Kaede asked herself quietly. She certainly had some ideas from her hobby.
Since Kaese wasn't getting anywhere anyway, she closed the laptop and picked up a book she wanted to read. Basically, it was a book that she had probably already read a thousand times. It was her mother's favorite book, which was actually a children's story.
But Kaede loved it. She had been read to as a child, which was perhaps the reason why she started writing herself. This children's book was mainly about the dreams and goals of individual children, which were mentioned.
However, a knock interrupted Kaede. Her expression changed from relaxed to annoyed when the door opened. "We're going to eat, are you coming?" asked her father, who, like her, had brown hair.
"No." Kaede refused immediately. "You could at least make an effort. Get to know her better." her father exhaled. "No, thanks." Kaede refused again.
Basically, she didn't want to be so absent-minded with her father. She didn't hate the new woman at his side either. But somehow Kaede couldn't forgive him for what he had done after her mother's death. Out of frustration, he hadn't contacted her for a whole night. The next morning, Kaede had seen him in his bed with a completely different woman. 
He often had his phases in which he longed for love, which she could understand. But Kaede had found the timing very bad and had still been mourning her mother. If Kaede remembered correctly, she was about seven years old.
"Shall I order you something?" her father asked and had to accept her attitude. He knew he had made one, if not several, mistakes back then. "I'll cook myself something, all good." Kaede spoke a little more gently, as her father had at least made an effort for her. At least she wanted to get close to him again, even if it might take a little longer.