Not afraid of it

                                    

                                          
hello hello everyone! this is probably going to be another short one, only due to the fact that I have been rather busy applying for jobs and everything. once I get my work schedule, I'll make a planned schedule and start updating regularly I hope! 
Warning: This chapter contains suicidal thoughts, suicide, and strong language. Please read at your own risk. If you ever feel this way, please reach out to me in my DMs or   your suicide hotline. The number in the US is 988, but I can and will gladly look for the others for you all.
second person
the night was quiet, the stars your only light as you made your way through the woods on your property. the sounds of cicadas were the only noises breaking through the quiet air. each footstep you took was careful, despite being quick. the lake came into view rather fast, a small smile pulling onto your lips. one last time. just one last time, you wanted to see the lake.
as you sat down on the wooden deck, you pulled a small bottle of whiskey from your bag. the way the moon was reflecting off the water was calming in a way. you unscrewed the cap before a voice broke through the silence.
"You shouldn't be out here alone, you know."
"Then why don't you come sit with me, Simon?" you asked softly. the man sighed, his footsteps heavy against the wood. he took a seat beside you as you raised the tiny shot bottle to your lips. the liquid burned going down your throat, but... it felt right to experience it one more time.
"So, what's bothering you? You never come out here anymore," Simon asked calmly, his voice breaking the calming silence once more. a small
sigh escaped your lungs as you looked out on the lake. you could trust him... right?
your eyes met his, (e/c) mixing with brown. a sense of longing could be seen in his eyes.
"Have you ever just wanted to disappear?" you faintly whispered out, holding his gaze. an uncomfortable moment settled upon you two before he answered, taking your hand in his.
"Disappear as in die?"
"Go missing, get murdered, kill yourself... pick your poison."
your eyes traveled back to the lake, your head laying on his shoulder.
"I would miss you if you left." Simon whispered, resting his head against yours. you couldn't place the feeling that swarmed at your chest as you sat there. was it the pills kicking in, or was it your heart accepting love?
it was probably the pills.
"I don't wanna be alone, Si..."
"You aren't. I'm here," he whispered. a small sigh escaped your lips. you were growing tired. taking in a deep breath, you shut your eyes.
third person
it was the last breath (Y/N) took. Simon's eye locked onto them, his heart pounding.
"(Y/N)?"
he shook them a little.
"(Y/N)?"






word count: 393