Hi

                                    

                                          
Hello my dear readers, This is not an update for the story but rather an update about how life is going nowadays. 
I just wanted to talk for some while. 
There are times where you may have a lot of people around you but you cannot share what's in your heart with anyone at all, thinking that they may judge you, and no matter how close you are with someone, it is a fact to be told that some say it on your face or some keep it in their hearts but everyone around you has a particular perspective about you, be it your dearest family or your longest friends. 
But what hurts the most is when you are not given the importance that you expected or you can say thought, that you deserved, from the people you care about. I don't know what am I even saying but i just feel hurt today. Hurt because I expected a little too much. My emotions have always been a turmoil, overthinking kills my mental peace all the time and maybe that is the reason that sometimes I just don't feel like doing anything. 
The story I am writing is just happy and gidy all the time, with positivity and goodness flowing, and at times I become unable to right positively when my mind and heart is filled with hurt and negativity. 
  
Honestly, there have not been a single day, which I spent all happily, one thing or the other end up hurting me and all the good mood hoes in vain. Being ignored or left out is like a habit now, may be imade someone feel like that and I'm getting my karma back, but it's just soo hurtful. 
I feel sad realising I'm not someone's top priority and that everyone has someone that they prefer over me, that i don't get the respect, care and love i give to people back to myself. 
In short people are sometimes just mean, and this can hurt you to the core. 
I don't know if any of you can understand how I'm feeling right now but whatever it is, it is destroying my mental peace and is hurting my heart again n again. 
I will delete this, but i request you to please help me, to calm me down, to make me feel worthy of myself, coz not all the time self assurance works.