Nicki Minaj
Trinidad
When I saw the news about Beyonce's wedding, I felt my heart drop.
I found myself back home, only this time I didn't know for how long.
Before leaving for Trinidad, media camped outside my apartment, I couldn't go anywhere. I waited for the perfect opportunity and made my way home without being seen nor pictured.
I just prayed that no crazed paparazzi would follow me all the way to Trinidad, surely there was more major breaking scandals to cover.
I blocked Beyonce, who shamelessly wouldn't stop calling and texting. She had a girlfriend or fiancé this entire time and slept with me.
My mother was happy to hear that I didn't go through with the abortion. To think I was prepared to discuss with Beyonce about my final decision in keeping the baby. All that changed as I watched while she kissed her wife on the news. A liar and a cheater, what a great combo and I was dumb enough to fall for her tricks. Was this her game? Sleeping with upcoming actresses?
Of all these thoughts running through my mind and I can't help but worry about my unborn child. What am I bringing them into?
3 months later.
"So you went through with the abortion?" it sounded more like a statement than a question. How I wish I could tell her the truth but a part of me knew however sisterly Lauren is to me, she's a fool in love. If word gets out, I'll be crucified.
Imagine the name calling, I'm already a home wrecker in people's eyes.
I couldn't help but wonder, how long were they together? The whole time I found solitude in Beyonce's place, where was she?
I thought about it alot more than I should.
The first trimester was the worst, I have to give it to women before me who went through all this without innovative healthcare. How fortunate am I and with the expertise of my mother next to me, a pure blessing. She was overjoyed, who knew getting pregnant would have her this happy. It may have something to do with my dad's passing, to truly heal from the lose of life, she wanted to experience the birth of a new life. Only then her heart will be slightly healed. No one truly gets over a lose of life, we learn to live with their permanent absence.
"Are you still with your girlfriend?" I deflected, hoping she would let it go.
"No, we broke a month ago, found her in bed with another woman. And you know what's worse, she didn't even seem scared to lose me nor fight for me. While I acted like a fool trying to fight her as the other woman scarried away. I didn't get a look at her face, not that it mattered.... We have it bad it the matters of love. I can't believe her dumb self would do that to me, but I think I'm the dumb one. Imagine falling for a player and getting shocked when you get played. I should have known better." I could hear the break in her voice, if only I was there to comfort her.
"Lo I'm so sorry, I-" she cut me off "I'm over it Nic, I just wish you were here" Being with child has made me more emotional, I cry at the slightest inconvenience.
"How about you come down here?" there was a quiet pause, followed by a reply. "I was checking the next available flight". I laughed while stroking my tummy.
Sure enough she found the earliest flight, which should have her touching down a day after tomorrow. It gave me less time to prepare for the interrogation I'm about to experience, I'll be drilled to the bone.
The first thing she noticed was my prodding belly of course. "You kept the baby? Oh my word, you kept the baby?!" she quickly put her ear against the bump. "Nika, I'm going to be an aunt?!" I laughed while telling her to keep her voice down. "Yes, you're going to be an aunt Lauren" she seemed more enthusiastic than I am.
