Chapter 5 - You and Me Rivalry

                                    

                                          
Everyone seems to like the new friend group recently, everyone and even their moms are talking about it! it's only been 2 days and it's on top of the charts trending!
And for Haerin, well she seems to be alright although we didn't get to talk as much. Didn't really like that though, she should be a little more open as she was just plus one, I mean why do I get to adjust when we're the people she comes for with? I don't understand? Besides that, I'm older and she's only been here for about a year which further supports my seemingly cocky opinion.
It is understandable to some degree considering that we've just met, she might be nervous after all, but she seriously needs to learn her manners.
I was starving, so I went over to the kitchen wanting to have the leftover salad I didn't finish from lunch, just to find out that it all was gone.
It's currently Monday I'll inform you, at this point I'm no longer at my parent's house, surely only one person could've eaten it. I'm obviously gonna call their name, that's the only food that's left. What I am gonna eat?
After I called, my boyfriend who has slightly brown wavy hair only an inch taller than me been dating for about 3 months, at last came through the door and it looked like he was about to say some things.
"Let's break up..."
"Are you kidding me? You're... joking right?"
"Jerry, please tell me this is a joke right now."
"I'm begging you..."
"I hate to break it to you, Danielle."
"What else did I need to do for you???"
"Sweetheart, what you did was enough."
"I'm the only one paying for this place, only because of what?? because I have more money? don't you feel embarrassed??? Is my money all that you want from me??????"
"God, I never knew that you were such a jerk!"
"I guess I am now... listen I've had ENOUGH I can't put up with your bullshit anymore, I'm done with you."
"Look at yourself... you're shifting, did It hurt? hearing those things as a man you couldn't even surpass my paycheck!"
"You know what, you should actually shut up. You're annoying me I'm getting embarrassed because of you again... THAT'S IT I'M LEAVING NOW!"
"Start packing your bags because I'm not leaving this place. All of these are mine REMEMBER THAT!"
"Sure! you can even keep the clothes in your laundry, which were mine! that you haven't washed ever since last week... you couldn't even do the simplest things!"
"Jerry, you know I'm a busy person... do you even know me AT ALL?!"
"If you wanted those clothes so badly why can't you wash them yourself??? stop being lazy!!"
...
Just when I was about to finish talking, he closed the door behind him saying goodbye, banging through the walls of my home it almost made the ornaments hanging next to it fall. He finally said his last final words, he left with no single intention of returning back. I let out a whiff of air breathing out as much as I could calming myself. "What a douchebag!!!" I said.
Why is it hard finding anyone true these days for me? Everyone just seems to use me for their benefit, at the end of the day it's always just gonna be my parents. Unlike everybody else, they've been here for me ever since the very beginning, even when I had no abilities to be able to do anything yet. Why is it that the more I grew up people became faker and faker towards me.
Love isn't just about the other person, but is a reflection of who you are, you are what you attract. Now you can only imagine what I feel about myself. 
Sure does look like I'm doing well by the way I portrayed it in social media, but this is my harsh reality. I'm just as miserable as the others especially when it comes to love.
30 minutes eventually passed, and only then did I start to somber out of sadness, at this point I started to doubt what on earth I did wrong. Was I really the problem all this time? My thoughts just continue spiraling eventually falling into a rabbit hole of self-blame. 
I tried to sleep the thoughts out of it in an attempt to cope with these problems away, "I really have no time for this I've got plans for today." I said out loud keeping in mind. I need to get a hold on myself. I could always just go drinking or just sleep some more later, whichever it is none are healthy for me but I know it'll help me in the long run.
Despite what happens behind the scenes even after all this, there's no place for me to hold on to an emotion for a long time, you have to keep going for the channel it is your job to cheer people's home after all, not depressing it even more for them, I mean this is my reputation... I don't think people would like to see me this way.
I get myself ready to go out again, as expected I have to go out filming again. I'm doing a concert vlog, as I promised my viewers that I will be posting for today specifically. I guess, this is perfect trying to distract myself.
We got to the place but not actually the stadium itself, everybody's just preparing and it's not gonna start anytime soon.
Same group of people as before I was with Hannie and Hyein featuring Haerin for a little part of it, she didn't go with us as she is only in a screen face cam off, not that of a surprise.
Preparing for all that energy we decided to grab something to eat, It's the perfect time for chit chat but I've decided not to share that I'm going through a breakup right now, I didn't go anywhere beyond that as I thought that it would ruin the mood.
We were about to enter the restaurant and I noticed my shoelace untied, I asked Hyein to do it for me and she agreed. "What a princess are you. "Hannie said, teasing me. I smiled although I'm slightly annoyed, I'm not in the mood for jokes right now..
Forget about that.
In the end we went in... "Woow!" I said. I was fascinated by the ambiance of this restaurant it's lively and even cozy! Haerin commented "Looks good there!" She said, on facetime.
We all got so excited! We went to our tables and ordered.
I ordered some Garlic Shrimp, while Hannie got Crab Cakes and Hyein Chopped Salad. As expected, it tastes just as good as it looks! this is fantastic!
From all that food I eventually got thirsty, I saw Hannie's hand was on the pitcher just a few seconds ago so I asked a favor. "Could you also pour me in a glass of water?" 
Hannie commented on that. "Danielle is so lazyyy how'd you even manage to have a boyfriend that can put up with this." She said. While I only responded in silence. "You can't even do that?" Haerin said jokingly adding even more to it. At this moment I got so pissed.
Okay, that's enough.
"You thought that was funny?"
"Will you please stop trying to label me as something? just let me operate myself however I want. Can you?" 
... 
After what I said, all three of them went silent altogether, they were shocked of course. It did look like I overreacted a bit from their end, although you need to understand where I was coming from. 
It is truly not my day today.