"Yeah that's one of my favorite movies"
She didn't say anything after that she just turned on the movie. 
Like 20 minutes in I started overthinking.
I should've told her what was wrong earlier it's just, it's much harder than it seems and I'm not ready for a relationship that she's bound to want if I tell her how I really feel.
I felt a hand on my head and instantly tensed up and I was going to protest but she started massaging my scalp and I instantly relaxed into her chest. I feel like my body and mind just decompressed from one simple touch.
"Lai"
"Hmm?"
"It's okay that I'm doing this?"
"Mmhm"
I was too relaxed and comfortable to worry about forming words, I want this forever.
 
The movie had just ended and we both finished our food and I was dozing off a little until Zariyah tapped me to sit up. Once I did, I did one of those big yell stretches and it felt amazing. 
"Where you going?"
"Bathroom" she said then walked off. 
"I'm going to call my sister in the hall real quick". I said it loud enough that she could hear me then rushed out the front door.
"Girl where the hell yo-"
I cut her off mid sentence. "I'm sorry for not reaching out we can talk about that later, I'm about to do something that I'm probably going to regret and I'm-"
Then she cut me off "girl shut the hell up cutting me off n shit". I rolled my eyes and huffed.
"I'm coming over tomorrow so whatever your about to do just do it I promise you will be perfectly fine, your a bad bitch and I know that girl likes you so don't trip. Whatever it is your scared of let that shit go it's holding you back. If things go sideways I'll be there to comfort you tonight if you text me if not have fun and just live your life stop holding on to the past". 
I sat there absolutely flabbergasted. "I- what. Why you gotta act like you know everything, what makes you think that's what I'm talking about". I rolled my eyes as if she could see me and she laughed.
"Girl bye  you just mad I know you better than you know yourself and ain't nobody got time for that little attitude".
I whispered under my breath not thinking she would hear me. "Gone for years and still think you know everything". 
"Bitch!? You done lost ya mind, I see you stressing out and stuff but don't start acting all delusional, if I could've been here with you all those years then i would've and I swear the only thing that got me through it was knowing you were out here somewhere alive and well."
I sat on the ground and thought for a second, I know I'm in the wrong right now but this whole starting my life thing has been exactly how hard I thought it'd be if not harder. 
"I'm sorry, it's just this is a lot I don't know what I'm doing"
"I know Lai Lai you don't gotta tell me because I know, we got eachother back and we gotta learn how to live a "normal" life and that's not going to be easy but we got each other that's gotta mean something."
"Yeah it definitely does I love you sissy, we gonna get this all sorted out tomorrow and I'm sorry for ghosting you".
"Girl I love you too now go get your girl so I can get my third round in with this little boy".
"Gurllllllll T. M. I".
We both laughed for a minute and said our goodbyes then hung up. 
I was standing up when I got a text from Zariyah.