Chapter 28

                                    

                                          
Now you realize why you should have the least expectations from people. 
Laying on the terrace, I stare at the vastness of night. The sky is embellished with the constellations like delicate gems, twinkling happily despite the absence of the moon. Perhaps they have accepted this eternal cyclic absence, hope waxing and waning.
Ivaan's soft breaths caress the skin of my neck, his small self cuddled into me. The little eyes of his give company to mine, capturing this beautiful scenic night sky far away from city life.
"Shortee, the stars are so pretty tonight," Ivaan whispers, his voice laced with wonder.
I can't help but smile at his innocent words. "Yes, baby, they are really beautiful," I murmur, pulling him a little closer. He is the only peace to my heart.
Ivaan snuggles deeper into my arms, his chubby fingers trying to trace the constellations in the sky. "I want to touch them," he sighs cutely.
"Someday, you may just get that chance, baby," I say, my heart swelling with the thought of Ivaan's immeasurable curiosity and dreams.
"Shortee, Can I ask you something?" Ivaan says. "You can ask me anything bacha." I caress his chubby cheeks and press a kiss on his temple.
"Why are you sad, lately?" He asks, his brow furrowed with concern.
I am shocked listening to such a concerning question coming from an innocent kid.
I quickly blink back the tears all ready to spill over and offer him a reassuring smile. "I'm not sad, Bubba. It's not that it's wrong to be sad, but I am fine and happy that's why I'm admiring the stars with you."
Ivaan studies my face for a moment, his eyes filled with wisdom beyond his years. 
He hugs me tightly, and mumbles, "You know people say a hug can make you feel really happy. Whenever you feel low, come to me I'll give you loads of hugs." 
I feel overwhelmed listening to his words, "That's a beautiful thing you know Ivaan, promise I'll come to you." I whisper, coddling him in my embrace.
As we continue to gaze up at the twinkling stars, I find solace in Ivaan's words. With a deep breath, I resolve to let go of my expectations and embrace the reality of my situation, focusing on the precious bond I have with this baby right here.
In this moment, surrounded by the the night sky, I find the strength to face the challenges that lie ahead. For as long as I have Ivaan by my side, I know I can bear any storm, and perhaps, one day, even find a way to mend the scratched pieces of my heart.
And about the money I owe Abhiraj, I'll pay him as soon as my funds mature. I can't trust anyone when it comes to money. 
What if, after some time he blames me for being money-hungry or a gold digger?  
I agree right now he is fine with helping me and wants to show his husband rights...but if, by mistake, he gets angry over any of my actions, it won't take him a second to point out all my shortcomings and what all he is doing for me.
And this always happens, I am telling from experience. 
Every time I disappointed anyone either because I made some mistake or they had too many expectations from me, they never left a single chance to demean me and dumped their mean judgments on me. They were merciless.
I don't want a repeat of the same.
My alarm rings, telling me it's time for Abhiraj to arrive. I have set this alarm so that we all can have dinner at the same time.