Don't Want It To Be True

                                    

                                          
"Carla, please just let her do whatever she needs to." Nana said, reaching through to the front of the car to give the police officer her house keys. The elderly woman could see the look of worry in Thea's eyes and knew that look. She'd seen it before, she'd owned that look before. It's the look of fear, the fear only people who have experienced real loss understand.
"Thanks Nana. I won't be long just please stay in the car." She locked eyes with Carla. "Please babe."
"Ok." Carla relented, watching the cop retrieve what she knew to be a gun from under her seat and stuff it in her jacket pocket.
Thea looked around all the car mirrors and down the street before exciting the vehicle. She used the keys, opened the door and flicked the safety off the gun in her pocket at the same time. As soon as she was out of street view she raised her arms and let her pistol lead the way. She swept every room, only momentarily becoming distracted in Carlas old room, a picture of her wife and Elena briefly stole her focus. She checked the garden from the upstairs windows and then went outside to check it fully and the alley next to it.
"All good." She opened the car door for Nana. "Just go straight in, I'll bring the bags." She helped the elderly lady stand and watched as her wife walked her relative to the front door, fully satisfied when the three of her passengers were safely in the house. She took a deep breath and lent on the boot of the car, trying to regain her focus and composure while still confident there were monsters lurking everywhere in this neighbourhood. 
Retrieving the bags she took cover from the open boot and put the safety back on her gun, placing it firmly in the band of her jeans and under her top. She took her time and some deep breaths, physically and mentally preparing herself for action and risk assessment. There was no way she'd be around here with Carla and not be armed. 
"What is she doing out there?" Aaliyah asked her friend who was stood at the living room window watching her wife.
"I have no idea, she just gets like this sometimes." The young woman sighed and headed into the kitchen.
"Girls, be patient with her. Think about the job she does, the things that woman must have seen, let alone what happened to her poor wife." Nana put a pot of tea on the table which Carla stirred before pouring four cups. "Last time you were here Carla you did get hurt and I couldn't protect you, neither could you Aaliyah so just be grateful we have someone who'd put themselves in harms way for all of us. Be grateful for that. You two are young, you've been protected but now your adults going out into the world... I know what it's like to worry like Thea does, you don't, not yet and I hope you never will."
For once Aaliyah was quiet, internally vowing to cut the cop a break and respect what Nana had said. Carla stood up from the table taking two tea cups and walked out of the kitchen and down the corridor where Thea was piling up the luggage.
"Tea babe?" 
"Thanks." The cop reached for her mug. "Could you just... move back a little."
Carla noticed how pained she looked, disappointed with herself for even asking. The younger woman took two steps back and moved to the right so she was semi hidden by the door.
"Is this ok?" She leant on the wall, cradling her tea.
"Perfect, thank you. I'm sorry."
"No Thea, I'm sorry."
"What are you sorry for beautiful?" She heaved the last of the bags in and shut the door.
"I asked you to bring me here, I knew how you'd feel about it but didn't really think about how it affects you. I don't believe I'm in any danger here but you do and you did it anyway because you love me."