33. attached

                                    

                                          
san was not at all like what wooyoung had thought. throughout the time they spent together, san had proved he was the complete opposite from the inconsiderate, rude person  wooyoung believed he was when they first met. 
wooyoung had become more impulsive, san was making him that way. but he couldn't help himself from wanting to be near san, san just had that affect on him. wooyoung was dreading the moment they had to say goodbye which is why he blurted the question out that he did and didn't think twice about it.
wooyoung knew his desire to be close to san would surprise him and he was correct in his thinking when he saw the look of bewilderment on the man's face in front of him.
"really? you want me to?" san asked, a hint of happiness laced in his surprised voice.
now wooyoung didn't want san to know how much he wanted to be in his company, although wooyoung had an idea san knew. san was quite confident in himself, acting affectionate was a breeze to him, while wooyoung felt strange about showing affection, the concept being all foreign to him.
wooyoung shrugged and averted his gaze, "if you want to, i don't mind either way". he said it quite nonchalantly, although he was hoping san would accept his offer. "i just thought you might be tired so...", wooyoung's voice trailed off as he awaited san's response.
he didn't have to look at san to see the big smile on his face, "okay, thanks" san responded and wooyoung nodded like it wasn't a big deal but inside he was bursting with excitement.
they walked in, san seating himself on the couch while wooyoung walked into the kitchen, grabbing two water bottles. he returned and handed one of the bottles to san.
"is there something you want to eat? you know, since we left?" wooyoung asked, standing in front of san.
san smiled and patted the seat next to him, prompting wooyoung to sit down, "just order something. i want to spend more time with you".
wooyoung grimaced, "it's pretty ironic to order food in a chef's house but okay" he shrugged and pulled his phone out, opening the doordash app.
"but aren't you tired?" san asked while wooyoung scrolled through the food options, "i mean you cook all day everyday, don't you ever get sick of it?".
wooyoung looked up at san, "no, actually" he replied, "it's my favorite thing to do". for as long as he could remember, cooking was the one joy in wooyoung's life. it was the one thing wooyoung was good at, the one thing he was completely confident and sure about.
as he placed their food order, wooyoung could feel san's gaze burning into him. looking back up, he saw san looking at him in adoration.
"what?" wooyoung asked, feeling a wave of butterflies swirling in his stomach. 
"you look so happy when you talk about cooking, it's fascinating" san replied, smiling so big that his dimples stuck out more than usual. wooyoung had to look away. the longer wooyoung saw san looking at him like that, the more he was tempted to kiss him. wooyoung couldn't trust himself or his actions when san stirred such feelings in him.
wooyoung cleared his throat, attempting to divert his thoughts, "the food will take some time. do you want to watch a movie or something?".
san chuckled and ruffled wooyoung's hair, "sure, but do you mind if i take a quick shower first? you can pick a movie for us in the meantime". 
it was a simple gesture, but even san touching his hair sent a shiver down wooyoung's spine. "go ahead, you can borrow clothes from my closet" wooyoung offered, keeping his gaze fixed on his lap as san made his way to the bedroom.
once he heard san close the door behind him, wooyoung sank back into the couch, letting out a deep breath in an attempt to calm his racing heart. those few minutes alone with san felt overwhelming. wooyoung couldn't imagine what the rest of the night would look like.
the last time san stayed over, wooyoung didn't feel this way because san didn't like him at that point. plus, they went straight to bed so there wasn't much interaction between them.
while wooyoung tried finding a movie, he couldn't help but feel he dug himself into a hole. he didn't have to invite san to spend the night, yet he did. he could've had a peaceful evening but he just had to be around san. he just had to act impulsively without thinking of the effects of his actions. why couldn't he just let san drop him off and go home? why did he want to be around san so badly?
"what are we watching?" wooyoung nearly jumped out of his skin as san plopped himself back on the couch. how long was he mindlessly scrolling that san had already finished his shower?
"um" wooyoung looked at the tv, seeing that he stopped on corpse bride. "huh," san remarked as he looked at the screen, "i didn't take you as a tim burton fan".
"oh no i-" wooyoung stopped as he stared at san. his hair was damp, clinging to his face, and he was wearing one of wooyoung's sweatpants at t-shirts. wooyoung was aware of the difference in size between them but he didn't realize how muscular san really was. wooyoung's t-shirts were quite oversized but they fit san rather snugly-  so snugly that san's muscles were visibly bulging beneath the fabric. 
luck was on wooyoung's side. at that moment, the doorbell rang, indicating that their food had arrived and san jumped up to get up, unaware that wooyoung was quite literally gawking at him. wooyoung swallowed hard, blinking rapidly as he tried to compose himself. there was no reason for wooyoung to be looking at san like that. san was simply wearing a shirt that just so happened to showcase his physique. it didn't mean wooyoung was attracted to him, or so he tried to convince himself.
"this looks good" san excitingly opened the food containers, letting the scent of fried chicken waft around in the room. 
"the chicken is really good" wooyoung commented as he played the movie. he kept his face turned fully towards the tv to refrain himself from drooling over the way san looked.
although wooyoung was staring at the screen, he wasn't paying the slightest attention. he couldn't focus on anything with san next to him. 
unable to help himself, wooyoung glanced over at san. wooyoung only meant to sneak a quick look without san knowing, since it seemed he was occupied with stuffing his face but to wooyoung's surprise, san was already looking at him.
embarrassed, wooyoung widened his eyes and quickly averted his gaze back to the tv. san chuckled and slung an arm around wooyoung, pulling him in closer.
wooyoung stiffened at first, but found himself relaxing in san's embrace. it felt nice. it felt warm. it felt safe. wooyoung didn't feel weird or strange at all. in fact, he found himself sinking deeper into san's chest.
wooyoung didn't know much about love or feelings or much about anything at all but at that moment, he knew one thing for sure.
he never wanted to leave san's side.