Homeless man lol

                                    

                                          
This one is a bit...chaotic...
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Im walking in the rain and i see a homeless man on the side of the street and he looks like he needs some help
he looks at me
His name is Ethan he has black hair and black eyes he is 6'4 and he is 21 years old
Ethan: Hello d-do you have some spare change?....
Me:Uh,nah,cuz like I don't carry cash or change,I only use card :/
Ethan: I understand thank you for at least hearing me out...
he tries to keep his self from crying
Me: You cryin?
*he starts to tear up some* 
Ethan: I-I have no where to stay I got kicked out of my apartment and-
Me: I didn't ask but go off-
Ethan: I-
he starts to tear up even more
Ethan: Im just so upset I don't know what to do...
Me: Uh,I mean you can get a job...?
Ethan: I- I-I...
he completely breaks down and begins to cry
Ethan: I dont know what to d-do... I'm all alone...
Me: That sucks,womp womp
he is crying profusely on the ground unable to even lift his head
Ethan: very muffled I- just want a home...
Me: Uh,I mean I guess you could stay at my house
he looks at me shocked to hear me say that but he wipes the tears from his face anyway
Ethan: R-really?...
Me: Ye,follow me homeless man
he follows behind me still a bit shaky and still wiping some tears from his face
we walk to my batcave
Me: We're here
Ethan: R-really?... 
he looks up at the bat cave
Ethan: t-thank you...
Me: No problemo,now uh,go get cleaned up. You look like shit
Ethan: r-right... 
he slowly walks over to the bat cave door
(Hehehehe 👹)
just when he touches the door,his hand catches on fire
he quickly jumps back
Ethan: DAMN IT THAT HURTS
Me:Oh shi-
Ethan: AH HOLY SHIT IT BURNS-
Me: Uhhhhhh,yea sorry I forgot about that
Ethan: MY HAND MY HAND OW GOD DAMN IT!
Me: BRO CALM DOWN ITS NOT THAT BAD,JUST A 3RD DEGREE BURN. GAWD DAYUM
Ethan: IT FEELS LIKE MY MOTHER FREAKIN FLESH IS SLIDING OFF THE GOD DAMN BONE!
Me: SKILL ISSUE KRILL ISSUE 🦐🦐🦐
Ethan: AAAAAAHHHHGHHHH GOD D-DAMN IT IT HURTS SO MUCH!
Me: BRO STOP SCREAMING BEFORE MY EARS FALL OFF,I throw him some ice HERES SOME GOD DAM ICE
Ethan quickly wraps the ice on his hand and tries to stop shaking and screaming
Me: Alright let's go then pussy
Ethan: o-ok... 
he slowly gets up and starts walking still holding his hand
Me: we wall through the door. Just then the floor drops beneath us
he falls down hitting the ground hard 
Ethan: AH F-FUU-
Me: AHAHAHAAAAA 
he lands in a painful way and yells out in pain
Ethan: AHHH GOD DAMMIT!
Me: PFFFFTTTTT- anyway welcome to wonderland 
he just lays on the ground for about a minute still processing everything 
Ethan: muffled What the hell...
Me: Get up bitch,we don't got all night
he slowly gets up still holding his hand 
Ethan: I-I cant feel my damn hand...
Me: Womp womp,let's go
Ethan: alright...
He shakily continues to follow behind me
Me: So basically,I'm batman
he looks at me shocked
Ethan: you're the batman?...
Me: No fuckity duckity dip sherlock
Ethan: Oh... Ok then...
he scratches his arm uncomfortably
Me: Why do u look so uncomfortable?
Ethan: well uh it's just because I still haven't really processed everything that's happened so far...
Me: Oh yea,I forgot ur kinda stupid
he looks shocked and taken a back by what i said
Ethan: w-what did you just say?...
Me: My point is proven
he is pissed off now 
Ethan: shut up...
Me: Nah,I don't think I will
he is still holding his hand and looks at me with hate in his eyes 
Ethan: just shut your stupid mouth...
Me: I'll do the opposite 
he is about to snap
Ethan: s-shut up...
Me: N O
he walks up to me and gets in my face
Ethan: I said shut up...
Me: What r u gonna do,hit me?
Ethan: y-no..
he then punches me square in the face
Me: WOOOOOOOOOOOOW, you actually did it
Ethan: I told you to shut up...
He grabs my collar and starts pulling me in closer
Me: Woah man,first punching me,then kissing me? Bi-polar ass
he grabs me by the hair and pulls me even closer
Ethan: I ain't kissing you dipshit...
>:0
Me: DONT TOUCH ME HAIRRRRRR,I screech. I then grab dog shit and stuff it in his mouth. Dog shit for a dog who has a shitty mouth
he tries to spit it out but i shove more and more of it down his throat 
Ethan: GAGGG-
Me: EAT ITTTTTTTT
He manages to spit some of it out and vomits all over me
Me: EWWWWWWWWIEEEEEEEEEE
☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆The end☆☆☆☆☆☆☆☆
Ok so,first story done. Yea I broke the ai lol. Anygays,I put two anime references I there. Can you find em? They are NOT from the same anime :3