As the ride continued, I found myself lost in a mix of emotions. Anger, sadness, and hope, all jumbled together in one big mess. I wanted to believe that Jude could change, that we could overcome this hurdle together. But deep down, I feared that history would only repeat itself, leaving me broken and alone once again.
The doubts and questions swirled in my mind, threatening to overwhelm me. But amidst the turmoil, one thing remained clear: I loved Jude with all my heart, and I wanted nothing more than for our relationship to succeed but I just didn't know how to get to that place with him
With a heavy heart, I tucked my phone. The driver stopped at my building, and I stepped out of the car, steeling myself for the walk ahead. As I began to walk, I noticed Trent across the street, his presence sending a jolt of guilt through me.
We hadn't spoken in what felt like ages, and the guilt of our history weighed heavily on my conscience. He looked busy on a phone call, but as I approached, he ended the conversation and caught my eye.
"You need to start using the library on campus. It's not as bad as you think," he said, his voice cutting through the distance between us.
I was taken aback by his sudden comment, not expecting any interaction between us. "Excuse me? How do you know where I'm coming from?" I asked, puzzled.
He nodded toward the bookmarker peeking out of the book I held in my hand. "I know that marker," he replied casually.
I chuckled nervously, feeling a bit of embarrassment. "Well, you know me. I stick to the evil I know," I quipped.
To my surprise, Trent fell into step beside me, his action catching me off guard. "I'm not sure we should be talking or even walking together," I said, feeling the need to address the elephant in the room.
"Why? Because your controlling boyfriend will have a meltdown?" he retorted, his tone laced with sarcasm.
I bristled at his words, feeling defensive. "Or your girlfriend wouldn't like you around a girl you used to date," I shot back. I wanted to take that back because now, I've snitched on myself as knowing to have seen him with another girl. 
He let out a laugh, his expression softening. "Well, she wouldn't mind because she's not insecure," he replied, his voice gentle yet firm. "Since you know so much and absolutely nothing at the same time. She's not my girlfriend, well not yet at least."
His words hit me like a punch to the gut, the shade he threw unmistakably. However, I couldn't focus on that, because there was that feeling again, the one where I knew I should be happy for him but I wasn't. I forced a smile and replied, "Well, I hope it works out. She's lucky to have you."
His smile widened at my words, and he nodded gratefully. "Thank you," he said sincerely, his eyes meeting mine.
Changing the subject, I began to tell him about a class I noticed he missed, we both hated that professor and the most embarrassing thing happened to him, I could hardly get the words out because it was so funny. But as I spoke, my gaze wandered, and that's when I saw it – a familiar vehicle parked nearby. My heart lurched in my chest as I recognized Jude sitting in the front seat, his eyes fixed on Trent and me.
I could see the pain etched on his face, and I knew that seeing Trent and I side by side would only fuel his worst fears. After all, I hadn't been answering his messages or calls, leaving him to imagine the worst.