Janine Beckie

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liverpoolno1fan

It's currently half time and me and Janine and I are talking away while we should be listening to 'improvements' when in reality, there are none as of the current moment. We're winning 2-0 to the USA, so there's nothing better than that, really.

All we've been told is to exploit space behind them more, which happens to be my specialty, and other than that, look for long and short distance passes more often. Stuff we do anyway, pretty much.

After another five minutes of us all messing about but getting ready for another long 45 minutes we headed back out to the pitch, this time we started of with the ball and moved up field pretty quickly, sometimes we would drag them over to our side leaving someone open the other end and do a long ball there which provided a run into the box. 

At around the 60th minute, Jessie gave away a free kick around 30 yards out of the box.

Tobin Heath crossed it into the box and I got my head to it, getting the ball a good distance away but when I landed I felt an excruciating, sharp and sudden pain in my knee, it was like a sudden twist in a way and I know somethings seriously wrong. Once I hit the floor, holding my knee, I used one arm to motion to the medics who didn't seem to make any move to go onto the pitch and wanted play to continue.

All I can think about is those 3 words, the ones that have been flying around football like there's no tomorrow. All I can think of is those names, Leah Williamson, Beth Mead, Viviane Miedema, and recently Jill Roord. 

"(Y/n/n) are you okay? (Y/n/n)." Janine said, giving me a little shake to grab my attention.

"I think the arsenal curse is catching up with me." I tried joking, but it ended up with me letting out a little cry.

It's like everything around me is blurred, I can hardly think straight, and all I can feel is the unbearable pain I'm in.

I know a couple of the USWNT girls are here, like Tobin and Alex. I also know a few on my squad were here like Janine and Jessie while the others were grabbing the medics or shouting at the ref that play should've been paused as soon as I went down instead of USA having to kick the ball out of play for me to get treatment.

"Hey! Don't speak like that. you'll be up and going in no time." Tobin said as an attempt to try to get me to feel better. I think it's not working, though.

"I felt my knee go." I sobbed into Janine's leg as I didn't want anyone having to see me cry, the other players don't deserve that and the fans don't deserve that but I suppose most of them are recording this right now and are going to be worried later. If it is those 3 words, then they're going to be devastated after the worry.

A couple minutes later, the medics ran on and began asking me questions.

"Are you okay?" One of them asked.

I chuckled at this while everyone else gave him a death stare. "Do I look alright right now? I'm leg on the ground holding my knee crying in fucking pain and you're asking me that." I say on the verge of sobbing.

After around another minute of the questions, two more ran on with a stretcher after Janine scolded them after asking me if I could walk. As I was put on the stretcher Janine held my hand and walked with me to the edge of the tunnel.

"I can asked to get subbed off you know, I can go with you."

"You do that and I'm leaving you permanently. I need you to go beat their asses for me."

"I'll see you after okay."

"You know it." I chuckled, giving her a wink. The pain meds have began kicking in and I couldn't be more thankful for it.

During the remainder of the game I was taken for X-rays and all that so they could get a clearer image. There's around five minutes left of game time right now and I know I should be watching, to support the team but I just can't bear the thought of it.

I suppose it hurts knowing I might be out for 9 months.

"(Y/n) we got your result."

I tried sitting up but was quickly stopped and told to stay still to prevent anymore damage.

"Through the scans we can confirm you are suffering an ACL tear." The doctor paused for a moment, "You obviously know that it is going to require surgery if you wish to continue playing football. As soon as someone else is here we can walk you through the procedure and what will happen then the physiotherapy needed after that."

I felt tears filling my eyes, I suppose the only good thing about this is that I'll go through it with Laura.

Around ten minutes later Janine ran in, straight to my side with the others on the team and then we was walked through the procedure, I would have in back in London so I can continue everything over there.

As soon as everyone other than Janine left I broke down in her arms.

"Hey, it's okay. I'm going to help you through this. It's the transfer window okay, I've managed to get a season loan at London city lionesses so I can stay with you. I'm going to help you through this." she murmured in my ear.

"thank you." I whispered, my voice breaking as more tears ran down my face. I cuddled into her side never wanting to let go.

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