Wilford Motherloving Warfstache!

                                    

                                          



"My name is Wilford Warfstache!!" 
The strange man shot his gun in the air at the ceiling.
No one had no idea what to do or say.
Except for Marvin, of course.
"Uh . . . . hi. Who the hell are .. . I mean . . . what the fuck? Why?"
Henrik just stared up at the hole in the ceiling, "Good thing this isn't actually MY house or I'd be really upset"
"Technically it is. I just took it over since the other you died, remember?" Anti mumbled.
Henrik just gave him a dry look and fixed his glasses, "Pardon me, but- wait, where'd he go?"
They all glanced around only to hear someone gasp.
Wilford was in front of Eva holding her hand delicately, "Well my my my, aren't you a lovely specimen. Say, are ya married?"
"Yes! I am!" Eva tore her hand away from him, "And I have two kids, too!" said kids were hiding behind her.
"Oh ho ho! Even better!" Wilford wiggled his brow but stopped sharply, frowning, "I mean the married part, not the kiddos. ANYWAY!"
He got a thing of bubbles out and blew bubbles in Olivia and Iris's faces who couldn't help but giggle.
"BUBBLES! They make EVERYTHING better, don't they, Anti!?"
Anti gaped at him, "Wait . . . how the FUCK do you know my name!?"
Jameson swat his shoulder, 'LANGUAGE! Children are still present!'
"Yeah, you really shouldn't cuss in front of kiddies, scout." Wilford scolded him, "Say you guys got any WEED around here!? I lost mine back in the 90s"
"Okay, that's it" Marvin cast a spell on the man, forcing him to sit down on the floor with ropes tied around him to keep him still, "ANSWER OUR QUESTIONS ALREADY! And how the hell did you understand James!?"
"Well you really didn't ask a lot. I already told ya my name . . .  And it's sign language. It's not that hard." Wilford seemed unbothered with being confined.
Jackie stormed up to him and leaned down to be level, "How do you know Anti's name? Where'd you come from? Are you with Darkiplier? You look exactly like him" he was calm but on the inside, he was just as stressed out as the others. This was NOT what they needed right now.
Wilford giggled, "Well there ya go, champ. . . .  Well ~ I KNOW Anti! We're good pals! Right buddy?" he looked at Anti strangely for a moment before his face fell, scrutinizing him, "Wait, no . . . . I'm doing that thing again, aren't I? You don't know me yet, do ya?" he chuckled, "Silly me . . . . Where'd I come from? I come from a LOT of different places! Here and there. . . . everywhere. All the time!" he drawled.
Suddenly he was gone out of the ropes and appeared in front of Jameson, poking at his mustache, "I like your style, friend. . . .. And as for the Darkiplier thing . ..  well we're like brothers, he and I!" he  stopped messing with Jameson's mustache and turned around to face the rest of them, a little sad again, "Of course.  .. he doesn't know that quite yet, either. He's a little lost right now. What year is it again? What universe am I in?"
They were getting the sense that this guy was a little out of his mind but Eva was starting to piece things together quicker.
"So . . . he's like your brother, you said? You're an alter of him, then, too? Like the boys are alters of each other?"
Wilford shrugged, "Alter?" he looked around at them all, "Well . . . sure, I guess! We call ourselves egos! The Iplier egos, to be exact! There's a lot of us! I've been helping to collect them!"