36.

                                    

                                          
36. court
• • •
The courthouse looked like a palace. I wasn't sure a simple case of custody should be held here. On the way, I secretly popped a pill in my mouth, waiting for my nerves to calm down. They never did. So I took another. The last one, I promise.
"You ready?" Dad asked, looking like he hadn't slept in weeks. His eyes were filled with worry, not wanting to lose me to his soon-to-be ex-wife. I took his hand, trying to comfort him, wanting to seem strong.
As soon as we sat down, my legs turned to jelly, I couldn't get up anymore, I didn't want to. All sounds and vision quickly blurred, becoming a daze, and the only thing I could hear clearly, was the heart promising in my chest, ready to burst free from the rib cage.
My thoughts were snapped in half when someone grabbed my hand. It was Pandora. I'm never leaving your side, and I am never letting you go. I remembered the words she said and I slightly relaxed, my senses slowly coming back. 
"All rise, all rise," someone with a booming voice announced, rattling the doors. "Judge Amir Ravenscroft." The judge nodded and picked up the little hammer on the desk. I felt uneasy in my stomach, as if I was about to be like Weasley and have a few slugs in front of me. 
"You may be seated," Judge Ravenscroft announced. "Today's case: a divorce between Aaron Snow and Leslie Snow. Mrs. Snow desires custody of her youngest daughter, Edith Snow." I gulped at the sound of my name as Pandora squeezed my hand in an act of reassurance. I watched Leslie rise from her seat, declaring all the reasons why she should have full custody of me. "I'm her birth mother." I scoffed, and Dad is also biological. What do you want, a metal?
Fear gripped my heart once again as she sat down and my father rose, also declaring his case. I couldn't depict any emotion from Judge Ravenscroft's face, it made my anxiety worse. I swallowed hard, trying to get rid of the lump in my throat. This was worse than any exam I've had at school, I think anybody could agree.
"So," the judge said after Dad sat down, "Pandora Lennox is the eldest, Mrs. Snow had her with a different man, while you were married to Mr. Snow. Is this correct?" Leslie nodded, verbalizing a small 'yes'. "Edith Snow was born afterward, before Mr. Snow knew about his wife's affair. Is this also true?" Leslie nodded again, this time staying quiet.
Good. I hoped she was scared. I hoped she was sinking through her shoes. I wished her the worst. My mind thought I was mad, and I was, but my emotions were so much more complicated than that, I was mad, I was scared, sad, anxious, nauseous, prideful, weak, tired. I was everything, but it also felt like nothing. I somehow felt wanted. My mother wanted me. For the first time in my life, my own mother wanted me. Did I want her? No. But she wanted me. Or maybe it was just to make my life a living hell. Or it was to break my father. Or any other sick reason she'd take me. It was times like these where I wished I was older, and considered an adult. Was it too late to run away?
• • •
Movies always made court seem so... interesting and in some cases even funny. In reality, it's stressful as fuck and nobody likes it. I didn't text anyone during any of it, I didn't call afterward to update my friends, and I avoided any sort of contact with Lorenzo. Whom I hoped kept his mouth shut and told no one, especially Theo, because we all know how that ended last time. I also avoided any conversations with my father and sister, unless it was an exchange of "good morning"s, "good night"s, and "how are you"s. I definitely didn't want to talk or even look or think about my mother. Dumb bitch.
Nothing seemed to change in court, the judge had a blank look on his face, everybody always shifted awkwardly in their seats, and it seemed as if the questions were being repeated, as if they were waiting for someone to get caught in their own lie. 
By the third day, I was ready to just give up and practically give myself over to my mother. After the court room had a break for discussion, everyone was called back. Judge Ravenscroft made his way back to the stand, taking the mallet back into his hand. "As a conclusion of this court, we have decided to let Mr. Aaron Snow take custody of Miss Edith Snow. As of this day forward, the divorce is finalised and Ms. Leslie Snow no longer has custody or authority of Miss Edith Snow. Case closed." He hit the little wooden circle, maybe in an attempt to silence the room, maybe to represent him putting his foot down. Whatever it was, it didn't stop Leslie from erupting into flames, screaming how I was her child and she had the right to me. Dad took my hand along with Pandora and led us out of the chaos, away from our screaming mother. Once outside, taking in the fresh air, everyone breathed a very heavy sigh of relief, as if we hadn't breathed properly in days. 
I know that I, for one, had never been more relieved. Those might have been the most stressful days I've ever experienced and I'm glad I would probably never have to go through any of that ever again. I was free for once.
• • •
we aren't gonna talk about how long i've been gone for and how short this chapter is-
istg i didn't mean to leave you all alone for this long :((
IM SO SORRY
TELL ME HOW I CAN MAKE IT UP TO YOU
---->
anywayssssssssssss
i promise i'll try harder and have better chapters than this one (this chapter is an ick)
think of this new update as a birthday present from me to you (even tho it'll be my birthday in like 1-2 days)
ANYWAYS
i forgot how many times i say the word 'anyways' in these author notes-
OOPS
oh well
also
i got passive aggressively slut shamed for wanting to wear a skirt to my boyfriend's house even tho i wore the same skirt out in public where there are many many many other boys and men
oh well...
at least i was responsible :P
also also also
i just cleaned out my closet and found a shirt i bought and lost 
SO IMMA WEAR IT TMRW
with a skirt that had a broken zipper but i managed to fix it :D
HOW ARE YOUUUUUUUUUUU
GIMME A LIFE UPDATE FROM THE PAST 2 MONTHS OF YOUR LIFEEEEEEEEEEEEEe
I MISSED YOU ALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
---->
MWAH MWAH MWAH MWAH
KISSES AND CROISSANTS 💋🥐