Chapter 41 - Broken

                                    

                                          
Jk Pov
Jimin walked away and I eyed his disappearing figure. He was fucking right, I was not in my right mind and the only face that reminded me was of YN's, her smiles, her cries, her moans...
Everything was fucking about her and I was so angry at myself for falling in love with her, for desiring her and especially for being a coward and a helpless guy who can't even stop his reason for live to go away. I'm fucking angry on myself and I was taking out that anger, that frustration on the guy as I stabbed him multiple times.

I was looking like a psycho who was getting pleasure by killing someone so brutally. I huffed out a good amount of air and that's when I noticed my hands were fully drenched in blood while holding the dagger. 

But I guess Jimin knows what I need as I saw Jinhyuk coming towards me. I handed him my dagger and he was cleaning it, meanwhile I wiped my hands and my face with a handkerchief. I wiped my face nicely as I didn't want any blood stain on it, because if I come across with YN, I don't want her to get terrified, but I guess I can hide my hands even if they have some dried blood stains. My white shirt too had few blood stains and yeah anybody could say I had a nice hunting tonight. 

I sat inside my car and Jinhyuk told that Jimin already went home. No wonder that he left me because I know he was furious at me. 
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It was already 11pm and after reaching home I immediately went to my room as I don't want to portray myself as a psycho. I have never returned home like this with blood all over my body but everything happens for a reason and I was sort of relieved now. 
I removed every single piece of cloth from my body and I entered the shower. I stood beneath the shower head and kept both of my palms on the bathroom tile and allowed the warm water to flow down to my body making my wounded heart and body calm. I looked at the floor and saw the pale red coloured water, I just smirked at it and rubbed shampoo on my hair after washing my body with the bodywash. I was completely fresh now and wore a sweatpant and nothing on top. 
I Straightly went to the bar section tonight too, ofc to get drunk again so that I can get a temporary escape from reality. Whenever I get too drunk and lean on the counter top with my eyes closed, I always feel YN's presence beside me, as if she's caressing my hairs as how she used to be. I guess this feeling is enough for me to live this life which I think is a punishment now. 

I was drinking my Black Label until I became half drunk, that's the moment I realised that there's only one more day left as it's already 12 at midnight. I badly wanted to meet her and talk to her. I want to apologize for breaking her again, more than what Alexis did I guess. I think if it's not today, then it won't happen any other time. 
YN pov
Sitting by the window at night became by daily habit past few days. I never felt the need to sleep as I know that I won't be able to fall asleep as how I used to. I still can't believe that the day has finally arrived which I have been afraid of. I agree that there used to be a time when I just wanted to run away from him, but now I'm yearning to stay with him till my last breathe. 
I just wonder how fast the night changed, from let me go to let me stay and trust me this transition is heartbreaking and unbearable. I want his presence near me and I still love him. 
These 5 days were like a hell to me, I know that I need to go from this mansion soon and I wanted the last 7 days at least to be memorable or spend some time with him, but honestly speaking I don't have the guts to.