Chapter 41 - Comeuppance

                                    

                                          
Author's Note: This should more or less wrap everything up, especially the arc with Obi-Wan. :D I hope y'all like how it unfolds, and the verdict handed out to the Jedi. ^-^ Also, this... includes our headcanon about Obi-Wan's past/family. :)
Epilogue: December 7th :D
~ Amina Gila
To say Obi-Wan is anxious about the fate of the Jedi and the Order would be an understatement, but at the same time, that's tempered by a sort of vicious resentment against them. He knows he shouldn't feel this way, knows it's not the Jedi way, but every time he thinks of Vader and Anakin, of his Anakins, he feels bitterness. The Council wanted to kill them both. They would have killed them both, and he would have been complicit in it, never knowing what he lost. As it is, he nearly did lose them.
It was close, too close.
He knows he'll feel regret no matter what Vader decides with respect to his fellow Jedi, but he'll also feel satisfaction at the knowledge that Anakin is safe from them. He doesn't know if that makes him a terrible Jedi or if it makes him not a Jedi at all.
He's never truly thought about leaving the Order. Sure, he said to Satine once that he would have left for her, but he'd been young then, and foolish, and he imagines he would have regretted it. He would have left the Order if Anakin had chosen to leave as a Padawan, too. That choice, though, he would not have regretted.
Ever since Anakin became his Padawan, he's been the most important person in his life, and Obi-Wan has always been hard-pressed to imagine a life without him. Even after his Knighting, he stubbornly stuck close. And then, Vader came, and everything changed. For so long, Obi-Wan has been blinded by anger and jealousy and resentment, and he feels so... foolish now. Meditating only helps so much. He doesn't know what he ought to do, what the best path would be. Or maybe he does know and he's just resisting.
Anakin won't come back to him, not this time, and Obi-Wan can't even blame him for that. He doesn't know what all Vader has endured, but he knows enough, and he's not strong enough to overcome the furious rage that swells up every time he thinks of his other self, the one who hurt Vader so badly. It could have been him, and that only makes him even angrier. It's of the Dark, and he knows better, but he can't – he can't let it go, doesn't know how, doesn't know if he even wants to.
The Jedi would have killed Anakin.
And he would have lived with that regret for the rest of his life.
It's not something he can let go of.
Somehow, he has to make it up to Anakin and Vader, both, and he only knows of one way. He has to prove to them that he's serious, that he cares about them, that he'll do anything for them, no matter what that might be. And that means leaving the Order. It means doing the same thing Ahsoka did: walking out and publicly siding with the Emperor.
Anakin always refused to let Obi-Wan push him away, finding his way back no matter what. Maybe it's time for Obi-Wan to repay that debt, to go back to Anakin's side to help and support him through the coming crisis, no matter what the outcome.
Besides, since he defeated Pre Vizsla, he rightfully won the Darksaber. From his mission to Mandalore, he knows the meaning of that. It means that he's the rightful leader of Mandalore. He... doesn't really want the burden or title, but there's a certain satisfaction to be had at the knowledge that he could choose that path if he wants. It gives him something he can do if – when he leaves. Because his leaving the Order is inevitable.
**w**
Obi-Wan arrives in the Emperor's office hardly any time after being summoned. He doesn't know why he was called here, but he's admittedly curious, especially since he was called alone, and the only other ones there are the Anakins. "Have you reached a decision about the Jedi?" he guesses, because he doesn't know what else Vader could want from him.