CHAPTER 44

                                    

                                          
NANDINI
I was strumming my guitar, playing the tune of Manik's song. It's been a week since I've met Manik now, and I miss him. But I understand. He is busy with the office. 
I also understand that he's turning workaholic to ebb the hurt the away. Losing Uncle due to fate and Aunty leaving him has hurt him. And this is his coping mechanism. 
But he's got to understand that him not taking care of himself is not right. Turning into a machine is not right. 
His song was complete. I'm waiting for a special occasion, on which I'll sing it out to him. His birthday is next month. Maybe I'll sing it to him then. But I'm also scared about it. I've poured my feelings into this song. 
I know that I love Manik, but what about him? Does he feel the same? I don't know the answer for that. What I know is that even if he doesn't love me, my love will be enough for us. 
A knock on the door pulled me out of my thoughts. I looked towards it and I saw Manik.
Without caring for anything, I rushed to him and hugged him tightly. He responded immediately, engulfing me in his arms. Oh God! How much did I miss him. I hugged him more tightly and he did the same. 
"I missed you," I said while still being in the hug.
"I missed you more Angel," he said, pressing a kiss on the top of my head.
We broke our hug, and our eyes locked. He took my lips in a soft kiss that felt like heaven. This moment was just perfect.
We pulled apart and he kissed my nose. "What were you playing? Play it to me na." 
I got nervous. No I can't do this right now. This has to be special. 
"You're here! Not that I'm complaining but you're done with your work?" I moved away and settled on the bed gesturing him to do the same.
"Nice topic change. Yes I was done for today and I thought why not spend the time with my Angel. Now, what were you playing?" he said while sitting down beside me.
"It's not prepared yet Manik. Once it's done na, you'll be the first one to here." I lied about it being not prepared. But the truth was, I was not prepared singing that in front of me right now.
"Shit man! Accha fine, but I'll always be the first one to listen to your songs. First me, then anybody else. Deal?"
"Done deal."
"Nandini," he took my hands in his and entwined our fingers. "I'm very bad right? I didn't even give any time to you this past week. I'm sorry."
"If you really are sorry, then take care of yourself Manik. I know you're hurting about Uncle Aunty. I understand that and I know this is your coping mechanism, but please take care of yourself. Not eating, not resting, it's not good for you. You're only harming yourself this way, and even the hurt is not going to get away this way."
He looked at me with a lot of emotions in his eyes. "How do you do this? How do you understand my unsaid words?"
"Because I'm Nandini."
"Yes, because you're Nandini. My Nandini."
He rested his forehead on mine. He wanted to listen to a song na? I can't sing his song right now, but I can sing another song right? Plus, Sid wants us to do jamming like before, but I wanted to sing first in front of Manik, then anybody else. 
I pulled back making him look at me confused. "You wanted to hear a song right?"
I positioned my guitar then looked at him. "I either way wanted you to be the first person I sing to. Sid has already asked for a jamming session which I refused by giving an excuse. But the truth was that I wanted to sing first in front of you. I wanted to start my singing again by singing to you. This song used to be my favorite. I just loved it, it's vibe, it's lyrics, everything. So here it goes."
I started playing the tune.
All I knew
This morning when I woke
Is I know something now
Know something now I didn't before
And all I've seen
Since eighteen hours ago
Is green eyes and freckles and your smile
In the back of my mind making me feel like
I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now
I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now
I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now
I just wanna know you, know you, know you
Cause all I know is we said Hello
And your eyes look like coming home
All I know is a simple name
And everything has changed
All I know is you held the door
You'll be mine and I'll be yours
All I know since yesterday
Is everything has changed
And all my walls stood tall painted blue
And I'll take 'em down, take 'em down 
And open up the door for you
And all I feel
In my stomach is butterflied
The beautiful kind, making up for lost time
Taking flight making me feel like
I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now
I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now
I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now
I just wanna know you, know you, know you
Cause all I know is we said Hello
And your eyes look like coming home
All I know is a simple name
And everything has changed
All I know is you held the door
You'll be mine and I'll be yours
All I know since yesterday
Is everything has changed
Come back and tell me why
I'm feeling like I've missed you all this time
And meet me there tonight
And let me know that it's not all in my mind
I just wanna know you better, know you better, know you better now
I just wanna know you, know you, know you
All I know is we said Hello
And your eyes look like coming home
All I know is a simple name
And everything has changed
All I know is you held the door
You'll be mine and I'll be yours
All I know since yesterday
Is everything has changed
All I know is we said Hello
So dust off your highest hopes
All I know is pouring rain
And everything has changed
All I know is a new found grace
All my days I'll know your face
All I know since yesterday
Is everything has changed
I looked up to see Manik looking at me with a soft smile.
"You have a beautiful voice. Listening you sing is like... it's like I was in some other world only."
He pulled me in for a soft kiss. It was so good that I found myself melting towards Manik. He broke the kiss and pecked my nose. "Everything has changed. Since I met you."
I didn't tell it to Manik, but earlier, whenever I used to sing this song, I used to think that this is how I'll feel when I'll meet my love for the first time. And now when I've sung it, all I could think about is how I felt when I was wondering who was my first kiss. 
I love Manik, even if he doesn't feel the same. I love Manik, and I know I'll do it for the rest of my life. I love Manik, unconditionally and irrevocably. 

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