four

                                    

                                          
unedited
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Asahi never got up so early in his life, even on days were he couldn't sleep. He just had to know, he walked out of his room and made himself a tea.
"Oh, Asahi, you're up rather bright and early," Mashiho said, Asahi didn't know why but the male just made him feel like his blood was boiling.
"Yeah, I'm heading out early," Asahi mumbled in a manner that Mashiho wouldn't understand not even in their native language.
Asahi took his tea to his room and got ready, putting on his new hat that he got the other day. He looked at himself in the mirror and a little feeling sparked in his head. It wasn't his usual numbing feeling, maybe today was going to be a good day.
Asahi took his satchel and put his shoes on at the door before heading out. He put on his AirPods drowning out the world around him.
"No makeup, no makeup," Asahi was softly singing to the tune before his foot hit a dent and he tripped.
Luckily he didn't trip in a way where he would fall to the floor, "Hey are you okay? Should look where you're going, you could have broken my board."
Even without looking Asahi knew who it was turning and meeting his eyes, "I, uh, I'm sorry."
"Yeah, I know," Jaehyuk shrugged, he walked to pick up his hat and dust it off.
"Oh."
Jaehyuk turned to Asahi and came close placing the hat on his head, "There, good as new."
Asahi felt as if his heart was going to beat out of his chest, it hurt. He stepped back scratching the back of his neck, "Thanks."
"I'm sorry about last time, I don't know what I did. I can't control it sometimes," Jaehyuk said.
Asahi tilted his head, "what? You made me feel whatever that was?"
Jaehyuk picked up his board and shrugged, "I guess you could say that."
"Then you can help me then," Asahi said, a hint of excitement in his voice.
It felt nice not to feel or sound emotionless sometimes, however, Jaehyuk looked at him confused, "I can't, I won't. "
Asahi followed him as he started to walk, "yes, you can. Tell me what this feeling is, I want to know, I have to understand."
Jaehyuk glanced at him, "I don't want to put you in pain anymore."
Asahi stepped in front of him, and Jaehyuk ran into him, "Do I feel pain right now? I want to know."
"No, you seem curious, maybe lost, and desperate,"  Jaehyuk said.
"Exactly, please. I think I can handle it now if we just start slowly, " Asahi said.
Jaehyuk shook his head, "No."
Asahi watched as he walked away, and his numbing feeling returned. A tear slipped down his face, "I hate this feeling."
Jaehyuk knew he could feel the gray cloud roll over the male figure and the raindrops slide down his face. He let out a sigh, he almost felt bad but he would rather see him like this rather than the way he screamed the other night.
Asahi let out a sigh, guess he understood where he came from but, he wanted to know. He had to understand.
He didn't want to let him walk away, Asahi ran up from behind him and hugged him. Jaehyuk's eyes widened at the unexpected contact.
"Sahi-"
"Please, I have the right to know how I feel, to understand my heart," Asahi said.
Jaehyuk reached up and unclasped his hands stepping away, "Leave me alone, I'll think about it."
Asahi nodded, "don't you want to know what it's like to be the source of someone's happiness?"
Jaehyuk looked down at him, "source of your happiness, me? Then your sadness, anger, and jealousy will also be me, right?"
"I know you don't want to hurt me but perhaps you can learn to control it also when you are with me," Asahi said, it was almost like an offer and it caught the boy's attention.
Jaehyuk pondered for a bit before turning around, "I'm gonna be late."
"What's your answer," Asahi said walking with him.
"Meet me in the library later," He said.
Asahi felt a smile creep onto his lips, Jaehyuk looked over at him being able to feel his happiness. Maybe it won't be so bad, he has a charming smile. Jaehyuk smiled to himself, and Asahi walked him to his class.
"Thanks, you didn't have to do that," Jaehyuk said.
Asahi shrugged, "I felt like you needed protection."
"Yeah, you felt it?"
Asahi shrugged, "No I saw it in a drama."
Jaehyuk laughed which made Asahi's heart stop then speed up, "see you later."
Asahi gave a small smile, just the corners of his lips, "Later."
He felt, content. His mission was accomplished when he made his way to his class.