winter

                                    

                                          
winter

I don't know how to act around these men. I feel safe and scared at the same time. I'm not scared

they'll hurt me. just scared they'll reject me or make me leave. I don't want to leave, ever. I know this

isn't my home and I'll eventually have to be a normal functioning adult. whatever that means. I just

want to do that here. maybe if I'm good and don't make them mad about anything I'll be able to stay.

I look to ryder "thank you for the coffee! whatever you want me to do to pay you back I'll do it. I

don't want to take advantage of the situation" breath winter. in and out, its ok he's not HIM, he'd

never hurt me. I just know it in my heart.

"Winter you don't owe us anything. all we want YOU to do is get better and take care of yourself. we

want to get to know you and hopefully you want to get to know us too" hes so handsome with those

big green eyes and shiny black hair. I just want to grab him and kiss those full lips. whats wrong with

me? I shouldn't be thinking about things like that. well why shouldn't I be? I can't let HIM control

my life anymore! he's not here. he's gone and I'm safe and I want this man to be mine.

I look over to see Bash watching me with interest. I want him too, can I do that? what am I thinking

it's way too soon for any of that. I just met these guys even though I used to know Bash, I don't

anymore. it's been 8 years since I've seen or talked to him. I'm so glad he stayed with me last night

though.

I haven't slept like that in forever. he was a perfect gentleman too. boo! I laugh at myself and they

both stare at me like im crazy. I clear my throat and keep laughing on the inside. I my courage up and

finally allow myself to ask him for some food. he'll let me eat right?

"do you think maybe that I could possibly, if its ok with you guys that, I don't, if you have any extra

that" i start rambling because I'm scared of what they might say if I ask for food. "Winter what is it

that you need? you can ask us for whatever you're wanting. please don't be afraid to ask"

I look at Ryder and decide to put my big girl pants on."can I have some food? I'm really hungry" he

doesn't say anything for a minute. uh oh, he said I could ask, maybe he didn't mean for that much. heshocks me by grabbing my arm and pulling me to him, putting his arms around me he says "I'm so

sorry baby, I should've brought you breakfast with the coffee what would you like? I can get you

anything"

I look over at Bash when he starts talking "why didn't you say anything sooner Winter? I could've

gotten you something too" I look down at my feet feeling a little self conscious "I just dont want to

be a bother. I can eat whenever it's best for you, whatevers easiest. I can just eat a little bit of bread.

that would be fine" that's what I'm used to eating anyways. I chance a look at him, he looks upset and

I'm not sure if it's at me, or what I said.

"you will never ONLY eat bread again. how about some eggs with cheese? I have some bacon too

and can make some jellied toast. if you're hungry let one of us know. please? we don't want you tobe hungry ever again" this man has my heart already. I don't want him to let me go. I want to stay in

his arms a little while longer. "anything you bring me I'll be grateful for im used to only eating bread

anyways so anything extra will feel like a gift" I give him a big smile and he smiles back at me. "I'll

be right back sweetheart" he says to me as he turns around and heads out the door. im so hungry he

could bring me a piece of paper and id eat it.