57. Jeongin

                                    

                                          
Jeongin sits on his bed, his phone in his hands. 
Hyunjin was here. 
Hyunjin was coming to him.
BUT WHY DID HE PUT A TINY LITTLE KISS ON THE END OF HIS MESSAGE?!
Jeongin was fully prepared to be strong and tough and stand his ground just like Changbin suggested. He wanted to show Hyunjin that he wasn't going to be disregarded or pushed away, this time he wanted to hold onto his feelings and let Hyunjin be the one to put his heart and soul on the line first. But then he'd added the "x" at the end of his message. It was like his thumb was on autopilot. 
It had been months, SEVEN MONTHS, but yet he'd clicked on "x" like it was its own send button. That little "x" had so much more weight behind it now too, at least that's how Jeongin felt, and the fact that Hyunjin had then sent one back had Jeongin bursting from the inside out.
Jeongin looked towards his door; he was thankful no stray party goers had tried to enter his room. The one benefit of having his room up so high, right down the end of the hallway, meant that not many people came down here. 
Jeongin had overheard people get halfway up the stairs to the third floor, only to stop and go back down when they found out this floor had no communal bathroom. Which was a half lie, there was a single toilet, it was just behind a locked door; not because people weren't allowed to use it, but more so because it was absolutely disgusting. It was a constant game of: What bodily fluids will you find on the wall today?
Jeongin shivers, trying not to think of what people do in there in their spare time, and instead on the creaking of floorboards he just heard outside his door.
Suddenly he was on his feet, his phone disregarded on his desk and his eyes glued to his door.
"Knock knock"
Jeongin holds his breath.
"Inn- Jeongin it's me. Are you there?"
Jeongin pounces on the door opening it to reveal Hyunjin, and holy fuck-
Hyunjin.
Hwang Hyunjin
He smelt like vanilla and he looked like he'd just dropped out of heaven, and his hair, oh boy his hair had grown longer and it just made him look that much more dreamy. He'd always said he wanted to grow it out from its short shaggy state, and heaven be blessed he finally did.
Jeongin was quite literally at war with himself. He was meant to be strong, but now he was staring Hyunjin in the face and Hyunjin was staring right back.
Jeongin's heart pounds.
Hyunjin makes the first move, stepping forwards into the room. Jeongin instinctively steps back to allow him the space to enter.
Hyunjin closes the door, sealing them inside. The air around them gets thicker by the second. The older's eyes briefly trail around the room, catching the dim light of his desk lamp before they land solely and squarely back on him. 
Jeongin gulps, his hands getting sweaty.
"I'm an idiot," Hyunjin says suddenly.
Jeongin would have laughed if it weren't for the serious look on his face.
"And I'm sorry for everything," Hyunjin continues.
Jeongin doesn't dare move. Not yet.
"I shouldn't have assumed you were with Seungmin. I know now from multiple sources you weren't together, and..and.." Hyunjin pauses, taking a deep breath in. "I should have let you speak back then when you pulled me aside, and I should have listened to what you had to say. I'm sorry I pushed you away. It's just, when you showed up with Seungmin looking the way you did, and touching each other like you were; I thought you were together and I thought you were trying to impress him. I didn't know the whole incident with the mud, his car and his clothes, which is my own fault for not listening. But for real, you could have walked in dripping mud all over the floor and I wouldn't cared. I would still think you were the most beautiful boy to have ever walked into my life. I'm sorry for letting you go, for not believing in our feelings. You may not have been in my present life for the last couple of months, but you've never left my mind. I want you Jeongin and I miss you so fucking much"