The Staircase

                                    

                                          

As I walk up the stairway I feel terror creep up my arms I could feel it biting into my skin it felt like millions of wasps were tearing into my flesh over and over again. It was begging me to turn around and to just go home but I didn't; I could't I had to push forward. Each step made me one second closer to breaking down. I felt sick to my stomach with fear, I felt like I was about to vomit. I can't be weak right now. Not with the war going on, not when I'm the king, 'The Viktoma'. My eyes ran across the stone walls, I've seen these walls every day for years but they never fail to draw me in, the beautiful vines that laced the stairway and the lanterns that made the stairs warm, it gave it a sense of freedom. They had big pink flowers that smelt sickeningly sweet like fruit candys. I know better. I know these vines are more like chains then anything else, I know that if you walk to close to them you're get stuck by the tangles and thorns. I know they were to good to be true. I knew better but I can't help myself then to walk a little closer then I should.
I took a few more step before I was under the trapped door that would take me out of the safety of the stairs. I pushed open the door that was above my head, the blueish grey paint was peeling off and landing on my hands, it was creating splinters and dust. The smells of nature and sadness flooded my nose as soon as I opened the door making me feel like this was my first time breathing in forever, like I was drowning and I finally broke through the surface of the water. Even though I've done this millions of times I can never get used to it. I crawled out of the warm stairway onto the leaf covered ground, getting my warn down clothes dirty and irritating the scabs that ran down my right leg. I stood up and took a deep breath smelling the flowering forest and salty ocean and sighed, " how could anything so wonderful harbor so much death and misery? '' I asked myself, disgusted at the irony of the war; I started walking towards the town. I stayed quiet knowing one wrong move will get me killed by whatever creatures that lived in the forest. I stared at the tree tops paying attention to the leafs for insects of prey. Luckily there weren't any I could see but because I was looking up I tripped over a log. I fell face-first into the dirt ' thunk' I felt the scabs on my leg reopen bleeding a little bit. I just laid there for a moment. I felt tired. All I wanted to do was go to sleep. What if I did go to sleep and just let the monsters that live in this forest kill me? They would devour me alive I would be in the belly of the beast. I snorted still just laying there, completely out of it. eventually I stood up wincing as the pain from when I fell finally set in. I didn't bother checking to see if I was injured, it was obvious I gained a few more scraps. I started to walk again this time paying more attention to my surroundings.
When I got to the town I was welcomed by the schoolyard and children playing. They looked only a few years younger than me maybe even the same age as me, I felt jealous. Why did they get to play, have fun, and smile when I had to fight for my life? It isn't fair but then again what is? My thoughts were cut short by the sound of pure joy "Thomas! I've been looking all over for you" a loud voice from behind me said "where did you say you lived again? I want to visit you" 
tI was brandon, he was a school teacher and the brother of a warrior that died fighting for me, brandon was what I pictured pure joy and happiness looked like. I looked over at him " a few miles out of town" I lied, I wish I could tell the truth but I can't. If I told the wrong person I'd be dead or disown by my country, but maybe that would be a good thing . " you know you can join those kids as they play, they are nice and around you're age" brandon said looking at the children playing " you are just a child after all" I don't know why but I felt anger bubbling up inside of me, how dare he call me a child. No child could do what I have done, a child couldn't be a king of a country especially when it was in a middle of a war, I am not a child. I am a monster like every one in my kingdom calls me, but I couldn't tell that to brandon. " I'm not interested in playing" I said coldly glaring at the children. I could practically feel brandon staring at me with pity. I don't deserve pity, I hate pity. " I have to go" I didn't give brandon the chance to talk before I walked away heading towards the barn that was next to the castle. As I stomped through the town I felt angry, sad, disgusted, and even scared. I don't know why I was scared. I was safe and nothing was wrong. When I finally got to the barn I immediately replaced the rag disguise I was wearing with my extremely fancy suit 
 I hate this suit so much, its to tight in all the wrong spots, its an ugly green color, and its incredibly itchy. At least I'll be getting a new one soon, and I'll finally get the privilege to pick what I want; instead of letting my adviser choose for me. My adviser was a tall skinny man, he is smart. Much smarter then me, after all I am just a stupid boy. I can't even get even good grades in school how am I ment to be good enough to know what's right for an entire kingdom. Not that good grades matter anyway I already have a job, a job I can never retire from. Unless of course I die. As I got changed I stared straight ahead watching for intruders or angry farm animals. I snorted to myself farm animals, I never thought I would call fire breathing dragons farm animals; but thats what they are. These dragons were small the biggest being up to my hip, the smallest up to my knee. They where lazy creatures only eating and napping all day, except of course when anyone came close. Then they tried to get pet and cuddled. They almost reminded me of cows or maybe even big pigs. I looked in the broken mirror that was laying on the floor making sure everything was perfect. I quickly shined my shoes and grabbed the next part of my outfit. The next thing was what looked like a ski mask and of corse my mask. As Viktoma I am not aloud to show my face when I'm on the 'job' so I wear a mask. It was made form a material that I didnt know. It felt like wood but it was cold and strong like metal but it didn't heat up. It was a pale grey with only eye holes in it making it difficult to breath in, like I was suffocating and everyone else got to breath. Like they deserved to get air and I didn't, because I was a monster.