Chapter 41

                                    

                                          
Brooke POV
We stood in the dew-covered grass, staring as 6 men lowered an ornate coffin into a hole in the ground.  I clutched Daniel's hand for comfort, sternly telling myself not to cry.
I didn't cry at the thud of dirt hitting a hard surface as they buried my friend.  I didn't cry while the ground was filled and packed down. 
I didn't cry while they placed the headstone on top of the fresh dirt.  I didn't cry when I read the inscription: Molly Teagle, loving friend and hero.  We miss you.
I did cry when I looked around and remembered she had no family to lay her to rest.  I had no idea who her mother was or if she was even alive. 
Her father was a psychopath who was burnt to ashes, the remaining bits of him scattered in a landfill.
I didn't know how long I stood staring at the piece of stone, the last reminder of my friend.  
Daniel tugged my hand gently, leading me away from our family cemetery.  Marcus had insisted she be buried there, knowing it would comfort me.  She saved me, she was family.
I let Daniel take me away, blindly following him to Marcus's office.
Marcus cleared his throat uncomfortably.  "So, Brooke, I just want to ask you a couple questions about your time...away...if that's ok."
I nodded numbly, not caring anymore.  "Besides your initial injuries and the ones that happened at the...event," he was careful not to mention the word wedding, "were you hurt at all?"
I shrugged.  "The guards beat me up a bit to keep me quiet, but other than that no one touched me.  He...wanted me healthy until that night."
They all sighed in relief, reading between the lines to understand that I wasn't sexually assaulted.
"What can we do to make this easier on you?" Lucas asked gently.
"Honestly, I just want to get back to normal.  I want to go to school, continue my shooting lessons.  I don't want anything to be different.  I need to talk to my friends about Molly, too."
They all nodded in understanding.
"But first I want to see Wanda," I added.  "And Daniel, you need to apologize to her.  I heard about your psychotic freak out on her and that's not cool."
He smiled sheepishly and jerked his head in a sort-of nod.
"I've already talked to Wanda, she cleared her schedule for you.  Whenever you're ready to talk, she'll be there," Marcus said.  
Suddenly I remembered something, something that had been bugging me for a while.  "Um, I just realized something about the first kidnapping.  I think Richard organized it.  I remember the guy saying something about how 'he' said I wouldn't be the way I was acting."
Marcus nodded slowly.  "That would make sense.  We investigated the man behind it and we determined he was working for someone, but Richard covered his tracks well.  I'll look into it more, but I think you're right.  Richard had been gunning for you for a while."
I shuddered at the thought but shoved it out of my mind.
Daniel spoke up suddenly.  "Since my oh-so-dear brothers knocked me out for 10 days, can I get a rundown of that time?  By the way, watch your backs.  I haven't forgiven you for that."
Marcus grinned while Michael gulped nervously.  I smiled and stood up.  "I'm gonna go talk to Wanda.  Good luck you guys."
Up in my room, Wanda's gently smiling face popped up on my laptop screen.  "Hey hon," she said gently.
I sighed, slumping against my headboard at the sight of her understanding smile.  "How are you?"
"Exhausted, drained, numb, sad about my friend," I listed off.  "But I can't seem to cry or express my emotions.  It's weird."
"That's completely normal.  Right now you're in shock.  The good news is eventually you'll be able to express all those big emotions; the bad news is it'll hit you like a truck. 
"So make sure wherever you are, you can find a safe space to let out those emotions when it happens.  The counseling office at school, your room at home, a bathroom if you're in a public space.  
"And lean on your brothers.  They're there for you, and it's not weak to be sad or afraid in front of them.  I know you've spent the last 5 years hiding your emotions away, but you're safe now.  It's ok to let them out."
I nodded, listening yet not quite agreeing.
"I know that's hard to believe, but trust me.  You'll feel so much better once you let your brothers in.  Now, let's talk about Molly."
My fist tightened slightly.  "I'm fine."
"No, you're not," she sighed.  "You watched her die.  That has extreme psychological ramifications.  You need to get it out."
I broke.  "She died because of me.  She killed her only family, for me.  And she told me not to blame myself, but how could I not?  How the hell do I come to terms with the fact that she would be alive if not for me?"
"No," Wanda said firmly.  "She died because she had a psycho father who didn't care about her.  She died doing something for a friend, for someone she loved.  You did not cause her death.  She died in peace.  Honor her wishes.  Keep her memory alive.  Celebrate her life with your friends.  That's what she would want."
"I'm scared that my friends will blame me," I admitted slowly.  "I don't want them to hate me.  It doesn't help that I can't even tell them the full story.  I don't know how to explain it without talking about my past."
"Why don't we find an explanation that's as close to the truth as possible without revealing things you're not comfortable talking about?" she suggested.
For the next hour we brainstormed stories, finally coming up with a logical explanation without mentioning the mafia or the personal connection I had to Molly's father.
A/N guys this chapter is really short but the next couple are super long so I promise it'll balance out.  Also we're almost done!