Part 25

                                    

                                          
LISA
I rolled to my side, expecting to feel the heat of Jennie's body next to me, and when I didn't, I extended out my arm to pull her closer to me, only she wasn't there. I opened one eye, then opened my other eye when I saw she wasn't in bed, thinking she left me. My stomach dropped. I suppose this is how Jennie feels when she opens her eyes and sees that I, too, am not in bed with her. I rolled onto my back, stared at the ceiling, then rubbed my eyes, trying to get them to focus correctly.
I heard a sound on the other side of the room and turned my head. There she was, leaning against the frame of the balcony door, staring into the sky, looking confused. "Babe? Are you alright?"
She looked at me, then looked back at whatever she was looking at in the sky. "I'm okay. I just couldn't sleep at all last night," she quietly said, sounding drained. Which had me thinking she drained herself thinking about us or what happened at the bar.
"I'm sorry about the bar incident, if that's what kept you up all night," I yawned while stretching my arms.
"Seeing that blonde with her hands on you, and how she tried getting you to take her to her room, as well as telling you her room number with hopes, you would come to her if you got bored with me, had my mind thinking bad thoughts all night."
"Babe," I sighed, rubbing my face in frustration. "Please don't tell me you're still bothered by a young drunk girl making stupid comments. We already talked about this," I groaned, flipping the bedsheets off me and swinging my legs over the bed.
What do I need to do to prove to her that I will be the girl who loves her and only her? And that I will not cheat on her? I know what I did was wrong, and I'm not happy with myself for doing what I did, but I'm not going to screw up what Jennie and I have. No fucking way...
"Last night, you were drunk."
"I wasn't that drunk. I knew what I was doing," I pleaded as I headed to Jennie.
"Yeah. But there's that what if? What would have happened had I not walk in when I did? What if you got drunker than what you were and did go to her room?"
Jennie had the same look of hurt in her eyes as she did the night of the convention. And I didn't like it. My arms desperately wrapped around hers and my head shook. Showing her she was wrong. "Jennie, Babe, look at me," I begged, curling my finger under her chin and turning her my way after she turned her head away from me. "Drunk or not, I still wouldn't cheat on you. I finally found the happiness I've wanted. Why would I destroy what I finally found? Do you want to know why it was easy for me to cheat on Kendal?"
Both her eyebrows arched high, but she still didn't speak. And with her brows raised as high as they were, I knew I got her attention. "The reason it was easy for me to do that to Kendal was that I didn't love her. I wouldn't cheat on someone I love. I love you, Jennie. So, please. I beg of you; please believe me. I know you're feeling a bit of insecurity about me because I cheated on Kendal with you. But that doesn't mean I would do the same to you because that will not happen."
"What if," she whispered. "What if you do get bored with me, and you decide to see what else is out there? If you did it to Kendal. You'd do it to me."
"No, Jennie," I said, shaking my head fast. "The difference is, I love you. Which I never loved Kendal. Never, ever, ever did I love her. Had I loved Kendal, you would not be in my life. As I said to you before, I tried to love her. For years I did. But I couldn't do it. When I met you, I instantly felt a connection and fell in love with you right away. There's absolutely one hundred percent, no way I would ever cheat on you. And if something like that were ever to happen... which it wouldn't... I'll permit you now to kill me."
Now that made her smile.
Whew. I finally said something right.
But I feel that something I said to make her smile was giving her permission to kill me. My hand raised in between us; then I pointed my finger into the air. "Make a note of this. I don't want to be a dead woman. So, don't worry about having to kill me," I said, then slowly smirked. I had to do something to get her mind to ease, and seeing how tired she looked, I lowered my hands to her ass, then I picked her up and carried her to the bed. "I just want to hold and comfort you. And to show you, I'm not going anywhere."
As she snuggled tightly in my arms, I couldn't stop kissing the top of her head and holding her just as tight as she was holding me. "Trust me with us," I whispered. "You are what I want. And when the time is right. I want you as my wife."
Her head tilted back with a questionable look on her face.
Then I noticed a single tear trickle down her cheek and wiped it away with my cheek, muttering, "I'm all yours. I promise..."
Jennie lowered her head onto my chest, and as we laid there in silence, I felt her body rest and knew she had fallen asleep. I didn't move the entire time she slept. All I wanted to do was to hold her. And when her eyes are to open, I want to be the first thing she saw, to give her the security she wants and needs. And that's one thing I need to start doing a better job at, and that's making sure she feels secure with our relationship. If she can't feel that in her heart or see it with her eyes, then our relationship will never go anywhere, and I'd be back to where I was with Kendal, and that's feeling miserable and unhappy.
Jennie's smile when she awoke made me smile. "I hope you had a better sleep?"
"I did."
"Now that you're awake and looking refreshed, I'd like for us to go look at homes. I really want to get you out of that apartment and into something bigger and better, with a huge yard that our child can play in when he or she gets bigger."
She smiled, "Okay, I'll go shower."
While Jennie was in the shower, I sat at the table, looking at my laptop and writing down addresses of the homes I wanted to take Jennie to see. Smiling at one of the houses, I liked and hoped Jennie would like. It had everything I was looking for, and it was on the perfect piece of land. But that smile quickly faded when my phone rang, and I saw it was Kendal.
I wasn't going to answer the call, but as I stared at her name, I wondered if she was calling to tell me she signed the papers, so I answered it. "Did you sign the papers?"
"No. Why would I sign the papers when I refuse to grant you the divorce?"
I curled up a fist, took a deep breath, then lowered my face in my hands, begging, "Just sign the papers, Kendal. Please."
"Why would I sign something so stupid when I want to fight for what's mine?"
"Sign the damn papers, Kendal!" I snapped. "I'm not yours, and I will not be this weakling you wanted me to be so that you could run me. I cut the strings, Kendal, and I am no longer your fucking puppet. Sign. The. Damn. Papers!"
"No."
"Why did you fucking call me, then? So you could fight with me more? Why fight me on this? There is no love between us, and to get you out of my life, I'm giving you everything. Including a house that was mine before we even got together."
I couldn't listen to her any longer. She was making no sense, saying things to me that I had no clue about or had ever heard before, and she sounded off. Very off. Almost as if she was on something or maybe even drunk because Kendal was definitely in la-la-land.
I hung up on her.
As upset as Jennie was about last night, and not wanting to upset her again before I take her house hunting, I kept my mouth zipped when Jennie came over and sat on my lap, studying my face.
"Is everything okay? You look upset or bothered by something."
"I'm fine," I smiled. "I'm just very anxious to show you these homes finally. They're all beautiful and perfect as you are," I smiled. "I'm also excited to buy you that dream home you've always wished to have, so we can put all the bad shit behind us and move forward with our lives. Together." I winked.
She stood with a smile, reached for my hand, and pulled me up off the chair. "Let's go, then."
As we were walking towards my car, I noticed it wasn't sitting right, and when we got up close, I saw why. My tires were flat. And they were all slashed.
"You have to be fucking kidding me!"