Chapter 3

                                    

                                          
I push the door open then quickly pull it back close.
Manners are important.
Sighing deeply. I knock twice. Waiting. 
And waiting. 
I knock again.
Knocking softly this time, twice more.
"Come in." 
I quickly find myself inside closing the door behind me. She's still under the covers on her stomach. So I move to the left where her head is angled.  Eyes closed, clearly doesn't care about my present. I am beginning to hate her none reaction towards me, so calm, patient and blah, blah, blah.
"Dad asked me to come." Looking around the room, this is the first time I have been in this room since day got married and Olivia moved in. a lot has changed, when did they change the colours on the walls. "He said I should apologize about reading your messages." Now I'm wondering why she said that instead of what was needed to be said. "I am..."
"Spencer please leave."
"Wait a minute."
She turns on the bed, the covers moving to her waist. She sits up. "I loved it when your attention was at a distance you know." Did my father also know about my crush? "Did they feed you something in boarding that made you think you had a chance with me. A boy like you should concentrate your studies instead of thinking Daddy will always be there to help you and burden your mother with your despicable behavior."
My jaw is clenched tight.
"I am your father's wife and you haven't given me respect since the day I met you." Olivia slides off the bed, wearing tiny shorts, coming to stand right in front of me that I could smell her morning breath. Mint. Does she wake up just to brush her teeth or did she have other reasons to do so? "If you saw me naked it's because I wanted you to, maybe I wanted to see if you are still a boy." She chuckles with distain on her face. "Guess we both know the answer to that." What?  "When you are done with your apology you can leave the room." 
She sits on the bed, balancing her weight on her elbows. Looking at me as if she's waiting for me to do something.
Looking up at me, nipples pressing against her white vest. Legs a little apart, giving me the illusion of them being apart. Suddenly I'm NOT confident because for some reason I feel like she just pressed play on a game I didn't register for.
In the end I walk out of the room with a tail between my legs.
More like I'm just ashamed at this point. 
Maybe I should take a shower and relax.
But how can I relax though? It's been two years since I have known Olivia, and I have always managed to keep my feelings aside, never showed interest and maybe that was the problem because now she thinks I am up to something, plus I admit I didn't approach this situation like a gentleman.
The water burns my skin as I keep wasting water instead of using it. She's my father's wife. I shouldn't even be entertaining this idea, yet here we are. 
Here we are.
Later that day I visit my mother and decide to spend the night. She makes my favourite meal for dinner and I help with the dishes after we are done eating while she cleans the stove because apparently I don't do it right. Says I leave stains. Okay.
"So what happened with you and your father?"
"What makes you think that?" she lifts an eyebrow. "I went through Olivia's phone yesterday." Her face falls and I have never hated myself more than this moment. She always said treat women the way you would me. "I apologized this morning." No I did not, at least not for what I actually did. An image of her breast pops in my mind.
"Spencer?" the frown keeps getting deeper. "Now why would you do that? Did she give you her phone?" Nodding. "So she trusted you with her phone and you took advantage of that. I am disappointed in you."
"I don't know what happened ma."
"I'll tell you what's going to happen. You will go back to your father's house and since its late I'll have your Cory pick you up." She picks up her phone ready to call him. Which I knew would happen. "This is not how we raised you Spencer James." 
When Dad picks up on the other side she starts going off as if he had control of the situation. She leaves me alone heading into the bedroom to talk properly about me.
I needed this. To remind me of my principles. 
After what seems like forever my mother walks back inside the room and gives it to me. Telling me how women should be treasured, that if I don't respect my mother then I can't respect another woman out there. Everything starts from home. Manners are important.
"Now I have to look at that woman and apologize."
"Mom you don't have to do that."
"Of course I don't, but you are my son, whatever foolishness you do out there comes back to me and as a parent those are the things we have to do." She gets up and heads to the kitchen. "Come get this pie and go give it to her once you get home, your father will be here soon."
I get up and I help with packing the pie. We end up baking some scorns. While they are in the oven, Dad gets here and I kiss my mom on the forehead before leaving. He doesn't come inside which I should get going.
"Take care, love you."
"I love you to, bye."
Guess who is in the car?
Exactly.
I get in, put on my seat belt and just sit there. Her perfume washes into my nose as soon as she rolls her windows down. Its fruity and something intoxicating to it. Aviating my eyes so that I don't end up doing something stupid. My mom's voice floats around and I hate that look she had in her eyes.
Looking at the street lights we keep passing. "I'm sorry about looking at your pictures." One thing i know is that I need to be able to look at myself in the mirror and like what I see. If push for this lust, it will only damage that image I have for myself. "I intentionally searched for those pictures and it was wrong of me. For that I am sorry."
Keeping her eyes on the road. "I hear you. I'm sure will eventually move passed it." Her thumb tapped on the wheel twice before caressing it. She repeated the pattern.  Leaning my head back, I watched the different light from cars and streetlights illuminating an aura around her. This is it I guess. Looking from afar.