Platonic Tony - Honesty

                                    

                                          
(tw, mentions of SA)
It was about 1:30am, and you knew only one person would be awake.
You came downstairs in your pjs to see Tony drinking a whiskey on the couch while working on his tablet.
"Tony?" You muttered as he looked up at you.
"Hey, kid. Everything okay?" He asked as you looked at him and nodded a little.
"I'm okay." You muttered as Tony turned off his tablet.
"You sure?" He asked as you felt tears in your eyes and slowly shook your head.
Tony put his glass down and stood up.
You hadn't been that close with Tony or any of the others really, only Peter who was around your own age.
He came over to you and placed his hand on your shoulder.
"Hey, come sit down. Want some hot cocoa?" He asked as you nodded and slowly sat down on the couch.
You waited for Tony to come back and he handed you a mug of hot cocoa.
"I'm sorry... I just didn't want to be alone." You whispered as he sat beside you.
"It's okay, I don't mind having some company. Do you want to talk about something?" He asked as you stared down at the mug.
"Just a nightmare." You whispered as Tony nodded.
"Well, sit back, relax and drink some hot cocoa it always helps me." He said handing you the remote, making you smile softly.
You put on some random show and leant back while you drank the hot cocoa.
"Can I ask you something?" You muttered as Tony looked up from his tablet again.
"Of course, kid." He responded as you suddenly felt nervous.
"It's kind of...a hard subject. But... Did you ever have anyone touch you inappropriately or sexually assault you? You don't have to tell me if you're uncomfortable." You asked, not daring to look at him.
"I did have an instance, yes. I was drunk, a woman took advantage of that even though I told her no multiple times." Tony replied as you looked at him.
"After it happened... Did it take a while to he sexual again?" You asked, feeling embarrassed having to ask these questions.
"It took me ages, I thought I was being so stupid, I thought I was weak and dumb and I blamed myself over and over. This might be too much information but the first time I masterbated after it I had a full blown panic attack that I had to be hospitalised for five days." He admitted, looking away with slight embarrassment.
"I'm sorry that you had to go through that." You whispered as Tony looked at you sadly.
"Did it happen to you?" He asked as you went back to staring at the mug in your hands.
"Yeah... A while ago. I haven't been sexual or anything and...I tried it tonight. I did it... But, I felt so guilty and sick and..." You trailed off, feeling tears in your eyes.
Tony moved a little closer.
"Hey, it's normal after something like that happens. Even if it's a long time after the incident. Your body still remembers it, and subconsciously your mind remembers every little thing. And unfortunately it's normal to feel guilty." He replied as you slowly looked at him.
"Why do I have to suffer when it wasn't me that did the bad thing?" You whispered as Tony looked at you sadly.
"Come here, kid." He replied, opening his arms. You placed your mug down and moved in closer and placed your head on his shoulder.
"I wish I had all the answers for you, kid. But, to be honest I don't know. It's not fair, it never is. But the one thing I do know is that it isn't your fault and that feeling this way is normal, and you're allowed to feel this way. Okay?" Tony asked as you closed your eyes and nodded.
"Let yourself feel without guilt, kid. You're allowed to and you're allowed to not hide it anymore, we're all here for you." Tony whispered as he wrapped his arm around you.
"Thank you, Tony." You whispered as you began to relax.
"You've got a family now, Y/N."