Chapter Thirty Nine

                                    

                                          
PHOTO: Olga and Tatiana Nikolaevna in Tsarskoe Selo, March 1914.

                            
                              
                                
                                
                              
                            
                            
                          
(I was thinking of this song in this chapter)
AUGUST 1914
Olga ended up not marrying Prince Carol. I was not up to the task either. I was sitting in the garden while painting, Cian was with me and he is such a better artist then me. Currently he was laughing his ass off because I accidentally drew the outline of an eye wrong. He was drawing flowers and I was drawing Margo. My fear was coming true, I was forgetting what she looked like and what she was like, so much time has passed since I first came here and so much things are happening that I'm forgetting my old life.
After many failed attempts and begging Cian for more paper, I had finally finished the outline. I held my brush firmly in my hands and twirled it around in the rich blue paint can, the bristles were now coated with a rich blue color. I raised my brush up to the eye and began filling it in. It was quiet and peaceful for a second, birds tweeted happily, grasshoppers were being annoying and the only sound was our brushes. Then I heard Maria's obnoxious laugh, she was probably flirting with another soldier again. It was her favorite pastime. "Oh my! I simply can't believe Asya didn't introduce you to me sooner!" She exclaimed. My neck nearly broke when it turned to see who she was talking too. Then, I saw the person I needed to see.
Swiftly, I got out of my chair making Cian stop mid stroke and look at me confused. I speedwalked over to them. My face was turning bright red. I marched until I was in front of them and stopped, my hands shook from the nerves. "Oh! Hello Asya." Maria exclaimed, looking smug as she did so. "Can you give us a moment?" I asked through clenched teeth. "Why of course my sweet and most darling sister!" Maria exclaimed too loudly. I held back the biggest eye roll I think I'd ever do, she was being nice enough to leave us alone.
Maria said goodbye and skipped off to watch Valentina beat Tatiana in chess for the 100th time with Zander laughing at Tatiana. It was only me and Malcolm in that spot. I turned to loom at him but his eyes were already on me. I felt myself shaking even more, it felt like my legs were about to give way and my heart began racing. I think i began sweating slightly. "Malcolm, I-"
"Astrid let me speak first, before you say anything." He cut me off. I shut my mouth with my face burning red like I was in the sun, I was even brighter than a strawberry by now. "I am engaged!" He announced. And I froze, I felt my mouth hit the floor and keep open. "Engaged?" I repeated in disbelief, tripping over my words. "Yes, I met her at a ball a few years ago. You will love her, she is really nice." Malcolm explained. I felt my heart shatter, I stood there like a fool. I was a fool, I was too late. I straightened up as best as I could even though my legs were giving up on me. "Well then, congratulations Malcolm." I murmured and stuck my hand out, a smile reached his face and he took my hand and shook it.
"This won't get in the way of our friendship?" He asked. I offered him a teary and broken smile, "Of course not." I promised, although I didn't really mean the promise. It felt more of a lie, my heart stopped racing and was slowing down. To its normal pace. Silence fell upon us and we started at each other. I heard an exclaim of happiness come from Valentina because she had beaten Tatiana. Malcolm was trying to read me just by looking at my eyes, in wish he knew what I was thinking, going through. So then I wouldn't have to explain myself, sounding like I'm crazy.
"So. When is the wedding date?" I asked, my hand reaching the bottom of my eye to wipe away a tear that had dropped from it and was running down my face. "We are planning an October wedding, we both just can't wait!" He answered, happily. I only nodded my head, "Sooo.. what is the lucky girls name?" I asked, my voice trying not to crack as I felt tears slowly swell up into my eyes. "Her name is Mila, you will like her. She will start working at the palace soon!"