Expecting

                                    

                                          
"Shit. Shit! SHIT!" I yelled, running all over the place, not knowing what to do. The smoke was starting to spread, and I started coughing.
"FUUUUUUUUCK!" I screamed again, opening the window and finally moving the melting electric kettle.
"What's going on?" Andy finally joined me in the kitchen. His eyes widened at the smoking mess on the stove.
"Shit, bring me paper towels. Fast!"
I did as told, running to the toilet and grabbing the toilet paper.
"Here you go," I said, handing it to him and covering my mouth with my free hand.
"Take this outside," he said, handing me the melted kettle and holding a heap of toilet paper under the running water. I quickly discarded the kettle in our backyard. When I returned to the smoke-filled kitchen, I asked if I could help with anything.
"No, you have definitely done enough," he said while wiping and scraping the melted plastic off our brand-new stove.
I stood awkwardly by our kitchen island, staring at Andy, who was trying to fix my mess.
"I'm sorry," I muttered.
"It's fine, babe. I've burned things before, too, but next time you have to react faster."
"But I did react. I yelled shit, shit, shit and fuck. That was me reacting, babe."
"Sophie, that is not what I meant..."
"No, but hear me out, Andy... I knew that you'd know how to fix it, therefore getting your attention was the most productive solution," I shrugged.
The kitchen finally stopped smelling like a toxic mess. I pulled myself up on the counter and sat patiently until he was done.
"You do know that the kettle is electric, and you don't actually have to turn the stove on for it to work, right?" He asked, when he was done saving the day.
"Oh? How does it work then?" I asked, rolling my eyes.
"You just push a little lever and let it do its magic... It's really wonderful what modern technology is capable of."
"You're such a funny guy."
"I know," he grinned, helping me off the counter. "What were you trying to do?" He asked.
"I was trying to cook. The stupid stove didn't work properly," I told him.
"It did this on purpose?" He asked, his eyes and mouth opened wide in shock. "That bitch!"
"Really, you should just get a stand-up comedy show signed to Netflix, or something," I said sarcastically.
"Just remove everything but the pot off the stove next time, okay?"
"Will do, boss," I said, saluting him.
"Is it safe to leave you here alone?" He asked me.
"Yes," I said.
"Okay, but keep in mind that melted plastic is not on my top-three list of side dishes."
"Just shut up and leave," I rolled my eyes again. I could hear him laughing all the way upstairs. When I heard him close his door, I sighed, shaking my head in disbelief. R.I.P. kettle, you were my favourite.
I tried my luck with the stove a second time. I carefully looked at all the little pictures next to the dials on the stove top. This time, I was sure I turned the right one. I removed the pot and saw the top right circle of the stove turning red. Good job, Soph.
I chopped up the onions and red bell-peppers while I waited for the water to start boiling. I put the veggies on a pan and while they were simmering, I put (hopefully enough of) pasta in the boiling water. Then, I added two cans of tuna to the pan. I stirred the contents and after a minute, I added oregano, cumin, and crushed garlic into the mix. After stirring it all for another minute or two, I drowned it all in sour cream. I sprinkled the sauce with grated cheese and let it all simmer on a lower temperature before I mixed the sauce with my perfectly al dente pasta. It was my go-to lunch when I was out of ideas of what to cook or in a hurry. Why was I in a hurry, you ask? Well, Andy and I are having guests over later. So, we have to eat lunch quickly before we go grocery shopping for beer and stuff like that. We invited Sam, Ronnie, Jinxx, CC, Jake and Lonny over for a housewarming party. I was kind of nervous about seeing the band again because of the slight scene I caused the last time. Hopefully, they don't hate me too much for it.