Announcement Fallout

                                    

                                          
I take a deep, steadying breath. I am going back into the arena next month. I am almost seven months pregnant, and I am going back into the games next month. There is no way for me to avoid this, not unless I want to spill my secret to Snow. Even then, he still won't make an exception, and it won't keep Peeta safe. Peeta. I have to go see Haymitch, he is the only one that will be able to protect Peeta now. I stand up and make my way back to the victor's village, walking as quickly as I'm able to. I don't bother to knock on is door, I just walk right in. He is sitting on his couch, with a drink in his hand, like usual. I make my way over to him and sit beside him.
"Ah, finally put the pieces together, have we? I'm assuming you came here to what? Ask me to die?"
"I came to drink."
I take the bottle from him and take a swig of the alcohol. It burns my throat as it goes down, making me gag. I take another, and another, until the bottle is almost empty. The burning feeling distracting me from the real reason I'm here. Shit, the baby. I put the bottle down quickly, gagging on the alcohol. I just drank and I'm pregnant. I look away from Haymitch, he doesn't know about the baby. I want to tell him, I want to fall apart and tell him that I'm pregnant and that I'm scared and that I don't want to die, but that I need to keep Peeta alive because everyone knows I'm not coming home again. This baby is going to need Peeta.
"You have to save him. Whatever it takes, you have to make sure Peeta lives."
"So, what if I told you that he was here about thirty minutes ago, begging me to save you? Begging to let him be the one in that arena with you?"
"No. Haymitch, Peeta lives. Not me. Please, promise me."
"If they call his name, I'll volunteer. But if not... there's nothing I can do."
"Thank you," I can feel the little alcohol I had starting to have its effect on me.
"You know, you could live a thousand lifetimes and never deserve that boy."
"I know," I sigh.
I stand up to leave, clutching my stomach as I start to feel sick again. I can just hope that I didn't hurt the baby with my horrible lapse in judgement. I'd forgotten I was pregnant and drank in that moment. I am reassured that my baby is okay as I feel movement inside of me. I hold onto my stomach more, feeling the movement against my hand and I can't help but smile. I make my way out of his house and walk across the victor's village to my house. I get inside the door and a pair of strong arms pulls me against them. I breath in his scent and tears burn my eyes as Gale holds me. He runs his fingers through my hair. Over his shoulder I can see my mom holding Prim and Peeta sitting on the couch, his head in his hands.
"I'm so sorry Katniss. We should've left when you asked. I wish we would've left, we could've been so far gone by now, all of us."
"No. We shouldn't have," I look up at him, his eyes meeting mine, "We would've made things worse had we left."
"I'm sorry for everything. I'm sorry for abandoning you when you told me about the baby. You told me that and you wanted me to be here for you, even if it is just as your best friend. I'm so sorry."
He walks with me into the kitchen and pulls something from a bag on the table. I notice it's a onesie, baby hat, and a baby rattle, he tells me that he had his mom make the onesie and hat and that he made the rattle. I feel the tears burning my eyes and streaming down my face again. I love it. I take it from him and hold it against my miniature bump. He laughs a little bit; I've missed his laugh. I've missed him. I feel the sickness in my stomach again and set the onesie down, quickly making my way over to the sink and throw up. Gale is behind me with in an instant, holding up my hair and rubbing my back. I hear Peeta making his way in too. He doesn't come over to us, I assume he is standing in the doorway of the kitchen. I finish and wipe my mouth with the paper towel Gale hands to me. I throw the towel into the trash and sit down at the table. Peeta walks over to me and kisses my forehead as Gale rinses out the sink.