Chapter 22: BETRAYAL?

                                    

                                          
Catiana's POV
"Do-Doc.. I think, y-you must be mi-mistaken. Baka na-nagkamali lang yu-yung test na ginawa niyo. Wala po akong sa-sakit. Wala po akong ganun." naluluhang sambit ko dito pero umiling iling lang siya.
Kasi naman eh! Hindi ako pwedeng magkasakit. No, hindi pwede, wala akong sakit. Hindi pwede eh, hindi 'to pwede!
"I know that it's hard for you to process everything Ms. Parker, but I did the test thrice not just twice to make sure that the result was right." saad nito, halata sa mukha nito na naaawa ito sakin.
Ayokong kaawaan ako ng kung sino. Hindi kasi eh! Hindi to pwede, wala akong sakit dapat. No...
"That's why you are having a hard time breathing or irregular heartbeats, is because of this. You also feel numb or some kind of dizziness dahilan para mawalan ka ng malay is because you are suffering from Congenital Heart Disease." Napatingin ako sa kawalan habang patuloy parin sa pagbagsak ang mga luha ko. Lahat ng sinabi niya ay tama. Lahat ng symptoms na sinabi niya ay naranasan ko nga iyon. 
Pero ayoko.. Hindi ko 'to matatanggap. 
Ayokong tanggapin kasi parang hindi naman totoo. Hindi 'to totoo. 
Hindi to dapat nangyayari sakin eh. Hindi...
Napahilamos ako ng mukha bago tiningnan muli ang doctor.
"I know what Congenital Heart Disease means Doc, pero bakit ako nagkaroon nito?" Naluluhang tanong ko parin dito.
"Siguro ay noon palang meron kana nito pero hindi pa ganun kalala, if you ever been in a situation na nahihirapang huminga ay yun na ang warning nun. But some people who have Congenital Heart Disease who did not suffer too much on childhood ay maaaring sa adulthood nito lalabas lahat. Just like you." pagkatapos nitong sabihin ay parang nawalan ako ng lakas. 
Pero bakit? Bakit noon pa lang ay hindi man lang nalaman na meron ako nito?
Does Mom and Dad know?
"There's a possibility that I'll survive right?" Nanginginig na na tanong ko sa doktora.
"I still can't say that. There some treatments that you need to do, but there is no cure for Congenital Heart Disease."
Parang nabingi ako sa narinig, I actually know that dahil medical field rin ang pinasukan ko pero, I still need my own doctor who'll treat me.
"There's a possibility that you'll be in a Sudden Cardiac Death, you need to be aware because your health was unstable." seryosong saad ng doctor.
Natapos kaming mag usap ng doctor sa lahat ng mga posibilidad na maaaring mangyari sakin at kung ano ano pa. 
The doctor said that this illness of mine was probably an in born, maaari daw na noon palang meron na ako nito pero ngayon lang talaga nagparamdam at lumala. Because, this sickness of mine was never been treated when I was in childhood.
Mom and Dad never told me about this. There's a possibility that they know it noon palang pero bakit wala silang sinabi sakin? O hindi lang talaga nila alam?
God, I want some peace right now. Nakakapagod na. 
Everything was just too heavy for me lately. I don't know what to do anymore. Everything sucks.
Hindi ko na alam kung ano na itong patutunguhan ng buhay ko. Masyado ng mabigat.
Hindi muna ako umalis ng hospital dahil gusto ko muna ng katahimikan ngayon kaya natagpuan ko na lang ang sarili ko sa rooftop ng hospital. Parang nawawalan ako ng lakas, yung mga tuhod ko ay nanginginig dahil sa kawalan ng lakas.