twelve.

                                    

                                          
After my injuries were fully healed, we decided to leave the town. We didn't receive a concrete mission, it was expected around safe places.
We didn't really talk in the first hour we left, which was strange as Kyojuro normally liked to endlessly chat. I was more like the quiet one, I normally just didn't know what to talk about, I was used to being alone, so conversation didn't come naturally to me.
But I wanted to ask him what was wrong, I really did, I just had no clue how to bring up the topic. I thought he would eventually talk if he wanted to share his troubles with me.
He eventually spoke up. "Kagemi..." he started, biting his lips. "I... I know it is a bit rude that I didn't invite you to our house. It's just... my family situation is not really simple right now"
"It is fine" I smiled at him. "I don't force you at all"
He nodded. I chew on my lips, I struggled asking him about what was wrong.
"Uhm... But if you want to share what's wrong... you know, I probably can't help you, but it is better to share the burden sometimes than keeping it to yourself"
"It's just I don't want to bother you with it" he shrugged. "Your life was much worse compared to my troubles. And I prefer being positive, looking into the future than contemplating on things I can't change"
I nodded. "I know, but you know... I am here to listen. You were willing to hear my past, and I want to know more about you" I smiled. "We are friends, after all"
He sighed, stopping. "Let's have lunch, okay?" he smiled. We sat on the ground near the road, taking out our food. We started eating, enjoying our lunch. Then he started to speak.
"I already told you that my father is the flame hashira..." he said and I nodded. "But, at this point we can say that he only was the flame hashira. He started neglecting his duties after so many things happened, so now he basically spends his days drinking and sleeping"
"And what about your mom?" I asked.
"She died of an illness some years ago. That's when my father started to change"
"I'm sorry..." I said. "I bet it is hard..."
"I got used to it" he shrugged. "I want to fight demons and protect people. I try to not break, I want to fulfill my duty. I really do. I am just worried about my brother. I'm scared that our father has too much influence on how he sees the world. Even if my brother decides not to take up my path, I want him to grow up to be strong and brave"
"I understand" I smiled at him. "But with a brother like you, I'm sure he will be strong. You are a good role model for anyone" I said, honestly. 
He grinned at me. "Thanks" he said loudly and cheerfully. "And also, thanks for listening"
"Anytime" I gave him a close-eyed smile. "That's what friends are for"
We finished eating soon, then continued our journey. We had no destination in mind, we were just hoping that a new mission would appear along the way.
Our crows were quietly flying next to us, Nozomi giving me weird glances sometimes, I failed to understand her, so I just ignored it. 
We decided to camp in the woods for the night, as the weather was nice. 
As I was laying on the ground at night, staring at the stars, I was thinking about the things he said earlier. About his family.
I knew what it felt like losing a parent. No matter what age you are, losing someone who was always by your side is difficult. And he also lost his father basically. 
At least I didn't have anyone to take care of, but he has a brother. 
He said that he didn't want to bother me as he thinks my life was worse, but I would disagree with that. I had my losses, but I left it in the past, focusing on getting stronger, but he still had to deal with issues caused by past tragedies.
And he still manages to look positive, I never saw him struggling. 
I honestly wanted to be as strong as he was. I am on my own, every one of my losses happened in the past, but sometimes in my dreams I am still an 8-years-old crying for help, weak against a demon.
I reached my hand to the sky, as if I could reach the stars.
I promised myself to become the strongest version of myself. I promised that I would do anything in my power to protect those who can't protect themselves against demons.
Kyojuro is a great friend and a great fighter, I already learned a lot from him. And he helped me to realize that I have more potential than I thought.
I started to get really sleepy, I took the first night watch, so I was thinking about waking up Kyojuro to switch. 
I sat up and stretched, letting out a big yawn. 
I walked to him, shaking his shoulders to wake him up. He was sleeping for three hours probably, he told me to wake him up after two, but I was so immersed in my thoughts, that time just flew buy. 
He woke up, greeting me with a big smile.
He sat up, stretching. "You let me sleep more, didn't you?" he asked.
"I wasn't tired" I shrugged. 
"Get some rest, Kagemi" he smiled. "You'll never know when you need your full strength"
"Yeah, yeah, I know, I'm sleeping" I waved my hand at him, then turned to my side.
The calming sound of the forest helped me to fall into a sweet, deep slumber.
—
I was woken up by the first rays of sunshine. It was very early, the sky still had a darker shade of blue.
Kyojuro was already preparing breakfast made of bird eggs. 
"I wanted to wake you up, I thought you had a nightmare" he said. "But you stopped so I decided to let you sleep. Is everything alright?"
I looked at him confused. I didn't recall having a nightmare.
"What did I do?" I asked, totally confused.
"You were just breathing heavily, nothing else" he said.
Breathing heavily? I zoned out, staring at his hands, mixing the eggs. 
Oh.
Oh.
My face turned tomato red in a second, finally recalling my dream.
"Are you okay?" he asked worried, placing his hand on my forehead, his eyes only inches away. The same thing happened in my dream. I quickly pulled away, suddenly feeling my heartbeat speeding up.
What is happening to me? And what was that dream? 
"Y-yeah I am fine" I stuttered. "I'm just feeling a bit hot because of the fire. I will sit a bit further"
He looked confused but he nodded. I pulled up my knees, embracing it, absentmindedly staring at him while we ate.
I never truly realized how pretty his eyes were..