Ten-Even Paul was once a scoffer

                                    

                                          



"Are you okay?"
Dani turned and saw Rachel watching her with sympathy. 
"Okay is a relative word." Dani's words were dry, but she managed a smile. "I woke up this morning. It's a beautiful day. I get to spend it with my son. I'm grateful."
The two of them stared at one another in front of the mirror inside the church bathroom. 
"Okay," Rachel drawled after a long pause like she was trying to decide if Dani was telling the truth or if she was about to fall apart. "I guess you're okay."
"Okay," Dani agreed.
Rachel's lips quirked at the corners.
Dani stared at the woman who was once one of her closest friends. Suddenly, they burst into laughter. 
For a moment Dani felt like they'd traveled back in time and were best friends that laughed at moments no one else would find humorous. Life was hard. It was in those quirky moments that she and Rachel and Annie had bonded. 
They kept laughing. Tears spilled down their cheeks.
She hadn't just walked away from Josh and Jacob, which was bad enough. Dani had cut ties with the very best friends in the world. 
Why? 
The answer was swift and sure. She had turned from God and Satan and sifted her like wheat. Just like Simon. Her laughter slowed.
What was that Bible verse? Luke something? She couldn't remember, but Jesus had told Simon that Satan asked to sift all of you like wheat.
When she and Rachel settled down, they were quiet for a long moment while they grabbed tissues to wipe the tears from their eyes and trails of mascara.
Rachel was the first to speak. "Look, I know this is awkward. Let's not pretend it isn't."
"It's awkward, but I'm still ok," she joked and saw Rachel's small smile. "I'm glad we're getting it out in the open. I don't want to pretend either."
Conflicting emotions played on Rachel's face. 
"Just say what you need to say," Dani encouraged. 
"Meredith is my friend, and I'm happy for her and Josh. I'm sorry if that hurts you." Sympathy or maybe pity flashed in Rachel's eyes. 
"I'd prefer your honesty. Thanks for that."
"This isn't how Josh wanted you to find out." Rachel's gaze pinned hers. "He wouldn't do that to you."
"He knew I was meeting you all after church to spend time with Jacob." There was no judgment in Dani's voice just the truth. Despite the rift between them, Josh was a good man. She didn't think he'd be cruel enough to ask her here to witness his marriage celebration. 
Last night she'd gotten the idea that he still cared. That maybe there was still a chance for them. How foolish of her. 
"None of us knew before this morning," Rachel said. "It was a surprise to us too."
"Really?"
"Yes. I wonder if you coming here—" Rach stopped and her eyes widened. 
"You wonder if me coming home prompted Josh to move on with his life," Dani finished for her. "It's possible."
 "No one expected you to come inside. You were adamant about your lack of faith in God. You didn't believe in Jesus. Not at all." 
"Paul didn't believe in Jesus, not at first," Dani spoke before considering her words and saw Rach's look of astonishment. "I've been reading the Bible."