Chapter 17 - Hiraeth

                                    

                                          
Saanson ne kahan rukh mod liya
Koi raah nazar mein na aaye
Dhadkan ne kahan dil chhod diya
Kahan chhode in jismon ne saaye
Hiraeth
[noun]
a deep longing for a home/a constant

Aditya Kumar Tripathi sat on the bench near Bhaskar Times, staring at the people passing by. At his life passing by. 
He was stuck. He wanted to be saved but he didn't know who to ask, so he sat there. 
Alone. 
Waiting.
He always thought he was a responsible man. He was brought up on morals, ethics, discipline, and responsibility. 
As a child, Aditya was never the naughtiest of the bunch. He had his moments, sure, but he was the serious one. The one that people pointed to when they wanted a role model for the child they would consider having. 
Despite being older, his sister would often reach out to him for advice. Despite being of a similar age, he spent his days saving Nishant from getting into scrapes. He never felt like he lost the opportunity to be young and carefree himself- no. 
He liked being listened to. He liked being looked up to.
So, Aditya grew up always knowing that responsibility was a pillar upon which he would stand tall. Taller than most.
He found Malini when he was visiting his alma mater for a reunion. She was new to town, in her final year, and getting ragged. He couldn't remember what it was for, just that he thought he needed to step in. She looked vulnerable and he'd wanted to help. 
That incident was all it took for them to embark on a friendship. Malini was beautiful, mature, smart, and happy to be with him. She was happy in his happiness. She looked at him like he made the sun rise. He liked being with her - someone he wasn't responsible for, for once. 
That friendship one day turned into a relationship. When or how that happened, he didn't know. He should have, but perhaps he hadn't paid attention to it. His focus at that time had been to become the best journalist Delhi had seen.
Then, suddenly, things changed. He was now the responsible brother who brought his sister home when her husband cheated on her. He was now also the responsible son who took up caring for his family when his only brother, his best friend, abandoned them with no warning. 
And in these responsibilities, he found a partner in Malini. 
She didn't ask him for his time, she gave him hers. 
She didn't lament his duties to his family, she encouraged them. 
It didn't bother him hence, being with Malini as more than friends. She was his best friend, and wasn't that telling of a good relationship? They understood each other, they trusted each other. She was well liked by his family which was important. He could learn to tolerate her mother eventually, he thought.
So, after years of being together, when people started asking when they were tying the knot, Aditya gave in.  He gave in to his mother's desire for a well educated, classy bahu. He gave in to Malini's desire to be married and move ahead in their relationship. He gave in to the family's desire for him to act as the responsible son.