Chapter Twenty-Eight

                                    

                                          
          Snape used his influence with the other teachers on staff to convince them to allow Rupert to stay in Hogwarts, with two months of detention, magic-less chores, and extra-curricular work as punishment. He argued that while discipline for his aggression was necessary, he should not be punished for standing up to a bully. Josh Philiman, who, after lying to the faculty several times, was finally given veritaserum and recounted the story exactly as Rupert and Peter had told it. 
          After Snape had threatened Josh with the exposure of some of his own secrets that he found in the putrid halls of Josh's mind, all parties agreed to never breathe a word of what had transpired that evening in the common room. He even apologized to Peter. 
          You took Peter and Rupert into Hogsmeade for some butterbeers and cider to celebrate. 
          Minerva had approached Snape months ago, asking him if he had met someone before you knew your mind had been exposed to him. When her question puzzled him, she had said, "Your spirit is lighter and some color has returned to your complexion...and something is just, different about you, Severus."  
          In the weeks following, she had noticed his watchful eye on you in the halls and at dinnertime, as well as his fixation on your and Peter's conversations and his subsequent envy. 
          "So...you have known for some time?" Snape asks Professor McGonagall. "I have," she replies simply, standing from her desk in the headmaster's office. "I am not usually one to permit such affairs by the members of our faculty, but after what you told me that night...of your plans, I am not going to stand in the way." 
          He feels himself breathe, unaware that he'd been holding his breath. She stands in front of the large desk, her hands clasped in front of her, "It has brought a hope to your eye that I have not seen since you were a boy, a young Slytherin. But do promise me you will keep in mind her subservience to you as her professor. She is young, Severus, and I do wish for her to exercise the agency necessary to make informed decisions." Snape nods gently with a thoughtful expression, agreeing. 
          "She has changed something within me, Minerva." "That I can see," her eyes twinkle at Snape, a perceptive smile filling her expression. Snape likes this headmaster much more than the last. 
          He stands to leave, one hand grasping his robe as it swirls behind him. "And Severus?" He stops, his black tresses sweeping across his chiseled features. "You trust her judgment and discretion of such information henceforth?" 
          "I do."
          You try not to pace in your room, wanting to remain inconspicuous to your roommates but worrying incessantly about whether you would be expelled or Severus would lose his position. You saw him entering the headmaster's office and knew they were finally going to discuss the ordeal. That was an hour ago. "I will handle it," you recall his words. You decide to go outside to walk off the nervous energy. 
          It was early December now, just a few weeks left until Christmas break. A blanket of white covers the Scottish scenery, its gentle hush having fallen over everything and causing an unwavering stillness. You could smell the crispness of winter riding the wind; most of the colorful leaves have fallen, leaving the trees bare and scraggly against the grey sky. You shove your hands deeper into your coat pockets and press against the chilly breeze, heading toward the lake. Your ears turn red with cold as your breath fogs in front of you. 
          Your mind drifts to what life could be like after Hogwarts, the crunch of your steps against the snowy ground accompanying the narration in your mind. It's hard to imagine anything else. Would you visit him at the school? See him on weekends and holidays? Would he even want to continue your...relations after you graduate?
          You hadn't planned on staying local, so the trips would become costly. You wanted to work with the Ministry of Magic, now that it's under new management, and spearhead the creation of The Department of Research of Magical Herbs and Potions. You'd need to be close to London for that.
          Leaning your weight over the dock's railing and staring into the icy depths, you see your reflection and almost don't recognize yourself. I look...happy, in spite of yourself. Your hand touches your cheek, as if in disbelief of the resolute, peaceful countenance looking back at you, eyes alight with hope, piercing through the clouds of uncertainty. Hope covering your soul with an unwavering stillness, like the snow on the earth around you. 
	           But have I destroyed the very thing responsible for this hope?
          You feel a presence behind you and a deep voice cuts the silence, "Thinking of going for a swim?" You turn around and smile, "Just clearing my head, Professor," wondering how he had managed to sneak up on you so silently. Your smile slowly fades, "What did the headmaster say?" He steps closer, his long strides bringing him near you until he's only inches away, your back to the railing. "I thought I told you not to worry," he raises an eyebrow sternly. 
           "That's impossible...I might have ruined everything," you respond quietly. Your eyes drop to his chest, wanting to hide your anxious thoughts from his penetrative gaze; though now that he is here you notice those thoughts beginning to dissipate in your mind. He gently lifts your chin to look up at him, bringing you to the present moment as nothing ever has before. 
          The bass of his voice vibrates against your body that is nearly touching his, the inescapable magnetism of him drawing you in, "Everything is alright now...neither of us are going anywhere," he says, his hands settling on the railing on either side of your body, enveloping you in his warmth. His robes billow in the breeze around you. "Nothing has been ruined." Your eyes find his again, his gaze gentle and calm. A wave of relief washes over you. He slowly leans in closer, bringing his lips inches from yours. You feel the warm breath of his nose tickle your cold cheek, your lips parting for his entrance. 
          "But that doesn't mean you shouldn't be held accountable for such...carelessness," he utters softly, his mouth an inch from yours. He pulls away leaving the space between you cold, but your insides warm and awakened in anticipation of his punishment. 
          He turns swiftly, leaving you alone and unkissed in the cold winter breeze.