28. ɪ ᴅᴇꜱᴇʀᴠᴇ ᴛᴏ ʙʟᴇᴇᴅ

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i deserve to bleed - sushi soucy

this is a rant

-

there's an addicting pain i can't rid of,

i yearn for the pain

i deserve it, don't i?

i press against my thighs with a sharp edge and squeeze my eyes shut, covering my mouth with my hands to conceal the screams. 

i can't stop

when i don't feel pain, i think im...selfish?

everything is confusing. 

i feel like i deserve the pain.

i watch as the blood seeps through.

then a sudden wave of panic comes.

'i have to cover this-'

i deserve to bleed.

--

i don't know why, but im so scared.

i feel too scared to live.

im scared of myself.

what if i cut myself again?

what if i do something to harm myself again?

everything seems so stressful.

i wish i could close my eyes and never wake up.

the world is too scary.

people are scary.

people make your life worse.

why cant i hide

im scared.

that's all.

--


𝘬𝘦𝘦𝘱𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘺 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘢𝘯𝘪𝘵𝘺Where stories live. Discover now