Chapter 39: Hospitals suck

                                    

                                          
"Pijamas?"
"Got it."
"Toothbrush and paste?"
"Got them."
"Book?"
"I've got three books, I think they're enough fro two days." 
My cousin Katia laughed at me, while I kept a serious face, scanning the list of all the things I needed for the hospitalization. 
Today is the big day, the much waited one. Although it's gonna be like my sixth surgery, I'm still nervous as if it was the first one. 
"Hey Kiara, c'mon. We've scanned your list way too many times. If you miss anything, I'll come back here to grab it. Don't worry, ok?"
She said, putting a hand on my shoulder, feeling the tensed up muscles. 
"I know you're freaking out right now, but you have no reasons. It's gonna be probably the easiest surgery you've ever had, so try to relax. Let's go now, your parents must be there already."
I nodded at her, not being able to say any words with a logic sense. Katia was right, exactly like everybody else who I talked to in these past days. Susanne, Mike, Hannah, even Pierre noticed my bad mood, even if I tried my best to not let it be too obvious. 
The drive was short, in fact I was used to reach the hospital walking, of course when I was able to. It was a private clinic, after all these months and surgeries, not talking about the many days I spent in this gym for the rehabilitation, I knew every staff member, from the receptionist to the last nurse. On the other hand I was pretty famous too for them, not for my career, but for my miraculous clinic situation. 
After the registration in the hall with a few nurses, I reached my room, together with my parents too, who left their work earlier to be by my side. I tried to convince them that it wasn't necessary, but obviously and fortunately they didn't believe me, so here they were. While I was putting away in the closet and in the small bathroom all my stuff, Mike, Suz and Hannah made their way in the all white room, sitting across the tiny bed. 
When I came back in the room, I felt everybody's gaze on me.
"Ok guys, please, let's stop this right now and there. No pity, no desperate cries, no fake smiles. I don't need compassion, I just need your support. I need a last laugh before being completely asleep for a few hours while Doc opened once again my leg to try and fix it, so please, I'm begging you- above all you mom- let's talk about something else, ok?"
They chuckled a bit at my words and started chatting about random things, from the boring choice of neutral colors for the hospital room to the conversation my dad had a few minutes ago with a nurse, who was trying to understand what was Formula 1. They stole me a laugh and in that moment I felt relaxed and happy to have them, at least until the doctor knocked at the door, entering with his team. 
"Kiara, how nice to see you again."
"No need to lie, Doc. I know you're bored of me."
"Honestly? Yea, I am a bit. But I'm pretty sure this will be one of the last times we see each other."
One last giggle escaped my mouths, before hugging and waving at my family and friends, in what will be my bedroom for the next days. 
***
The usual beep from the machinery next to the bed woke me up.
I reopened the eyes, struggling with the led lights on the ceiling. The duvets of the bed weren't that soft, at least not as much as the ones I was used to sleep in when I was away with the team all over the world, in some of the fanciest hotels ever. The pillow was very low, that low that my neck was hurting. Still with my eyes a bit closed and a heavy head, I tried to move and pull myself a bit up on the mattress, but all of sudden I felt a hand on my chest, pushing me down.