Five

                                    

                                          

I woke up but not from Harry fallling of his bed he wasn't even there when i woke up I woke up from a knock on the door 
"I'm coming" I shouted and changed  quickly before walking up the door I opened the door and there was mj staying in front of me. 
"What are you doing here?" 
"I was checking on you" she said and came in 
Why is she here? It's not like I need someone right now I'm fine absolutely fine  I lied to myself maybe if I say it of enough it becomes true 
"What? why?" I asked
She came in and looked around the room "Peter I'm not  stupid you know? Gwen she told me who she is and that she saw you at the rooftop"
What did Gwen told her? That I just was chilling at the rooftop with totally not the urge to jump
"What did Gwen told you mj?" 
"What happend to her Peter that she saw you looking back for a short moment she thought you would jump"
"I totally wouldn't do that"  I lied
Well not in front of anyone
"Peter come on tell me"
Flash voice in my head again
Dumb boy 
You useless
No one likes you
You make everyone just worry about you
What else can you expect bring people to worry about you? Oh yeah that's right nothing 
Disappointment 
Mj hold me out of my thoughts 
"Peter..."
"What?" 
She pointed at my wrist "I know it"
"What do you mean?" I think the best is to play stupid at the moment 
Your always stupid
You know that don't you? You're stupid
You should die 
Because of you dad died
You should be ashamed of yourself 
Flash's voice was right it's my fault dad died when I wasn't stronger than that he would be still alive I was the reason dad died i should die he shouldn't had died. He should be here with his family but he isn't I should have died instead. After all it's my fault he's dead it's all my fault
"Peter?" Mj asked when I was just standing there for seven minutes 
"Why are you really here mj?"  I asked her serious 
I don't think she cares why would she? It's my fault she nearly died it's my fault aunt may died  all  die because of me they should stay away from me they're all in danger because of me maybe if I'm not here anymore they won't be in danger anymore 
"What do you mean? I'm trying to help!" 
"Just go away please i don't want you to die too" I said and sat on my bed 
"Peter...it's not your fault they died people just die you can't do anything about it"
"But if I were stronger If I didn't had got turned into fucking dust my dad...he still would be here he would be still alive" I sobbed
"It was his choice Peter he saved you I don't think he wants you to be sad it's not your fault you hear me?"
Yes it is 
Don't listen to her 
She's lying 
It's your fault he's dead
It's your fault aunt may is dead
When it should have been you
"I should have died instead maybe then they would be still alive and live their lives after all it's my fault"
"It's not your fault Peter. Osborn went crazy he killed her it's not your fault she wouldn't wanted you like that being  sad and your dad decided himself what he did he saved the world he saved you and he for sure don't want you blaming yourself"
"I know but if I was faster I could have saved her  and maybe even my dad I mean Osborns son is here I'm friends with him actually"
Harry's dad killed my aunt and then I wanted to kill him but peter2 stopped me 
"What?" she asked confused 
"Mj..." I pointed at the photo of Harry and his father 
"What the fuck" Is all she said 
„But he's nice he just wants back home I help him and Gwen to go back to their unvierse without the dying thing this time"
„Yeah Gwen told me about Harry"
„No the Harry that killed her this one's from a different universe then Gwen"
„Alright"
„Yeah"
Suddenly Harry ran in the room  and fell on the bed 
"I go I  text you later" mj said  and turned to Harry "hurt him and I kill him" she said and left the room
"A friend of yours?" Harry's asked me while being completely out of breath  and confused at the same time
"Yeah... she would kill you....well I can't promise anything  anyway why the hell are you so exhausted?"
"I ran away from...humans"
I just I felt like i shouldn't ask him about that so I didn't 
I hope my dad is still alive and it was all just a dream and when I wake up he be there and tell me all would be okay and then aunt may would say that it was all just a nightmare 
Then I remembered 
"Oh shit" I wishpered to myself 
I have to talk to Ned
"I come back later" I said and left the room to search Ned. 
I went down the campus to find ned and left the thoughts for now.