More Than Dead

                                    

                                          
I'm still not ready to actually be serious and accept the fact that the finale actually happened, so here's some random crap to cheer us all up!
*******
                          
Emma: I VOLUNTEER AS TRIBUTE!!!
Fandom: NO YOU DON'T
*******
Charming jabbed Killian with his sword.
                          
He felt it.
*******
The Killian in the Alternate Universe was jealous of Real Killian, who was jealous of Past Killian who would probably be jealous of Real Killian now. It's a beautiful cycle.
*******
Can you imagine what will happen whenever David doesn't do something Killian wants from now on?
                          
Killian: Dave, sandwich!
David: I am not you maid! Get your own damn sandwich!
Killian: Remember that time-
David: I swear to god, if you even try that again-
Killian: Remem-
David: No.
Killian: REMEMBER THAT ONE TIME YOU KILLED ME?!?
David: YOU'RE FINE!
Killian: I DIED!!
David: OH MY GOD.
                          
Or...
                          
Emma: I'm pregnant!
Snow: OMG EMMA OMG HUGGGSSS!!
David: WHAT?!?
Emma: Dad?
David: THAT PIRATE KNOCKED YOU UP?!?
Killian: That pirate is right here... But yes, if you must ask *smirks*
David: *leaves room*
Emma: He's not...
Snow: He wouldn't...
Killian: He is.
David: *Waves sword*
Emma: Remember last time you two were close together with a sword?
Killian: Wouldn't want to kill the father of your new grandchild. AGAIN.
David: IT WAS TWO YEARS AGO!
*******
Am I the only one that wants to see the conversation between Emma and Rumple after what happened?
                          
Emma: This is your fault.
Rumple: The Dark One likes chocolate chip cookies. Feed it chocolate cake though, and you'll wake up in the middle of a dead village with no recollection of what happened.
Emma: Are you serious?!?
Rumple: Happy Dark One, happy life.
Emma: Go to hell
*******
{Captain Swan feels alert}
                          
Remember when the only indication that Emma had any feeling for Killian was a simple, teary,  "Good," and a kiss she claimed was meaningless? 
                          
Remember how that was enough for him to think of her every day for a year and trade his ship for just the chance that he could see her again, even if she didn't remember him?
                          
Can you imagine how hard he's going to fight now, after she's said she loves him, after everything they've been through since?
                          
Can you imagine how many of us will be dead and crying through that?!?
*******
Okay, look. I love Killian Jones to death (literally because damnit Killian, you died!) But are we even surprised the man died? Because, like, how many times has this guy almost gotten himself killed or injured? Let's see:
                          
1. He lived to be 300 years old (and counting!)
2. He got his hand chopped off
3. Nearly got his heart ripped out by people
4. Got beaten up by Rumple's cane of crazy
5. Emma tied him to a tree, held a knife to his throat and almost left him as ogre breakfast
6. Anton the giant almost killed him like four times.
7. Emma left him to die at the top of the beanstalk
8. Emma knocked him out with that compass (I still think he let her win)
9. He got hit by a car and broke a ton of ribs
10. He also got knocked out with a wooden plank, again, thanks to his future girlfriend
11. Greg and Tamara kidnapped him and tied him to a chair in the clock tower and in the back of a truck
12. A bookshelf almost crushed him
13. Cora shoved him into a bookcase and he passed out
14. Regina threw him off a cliff to face Maleficent
15. David punched him in the face
This is just season 2!!!
16. Got his shadow ripped out
17. Zelena tried to drown him
18. He got knocked into a haystack and passed out
19. Flying monkeys attacked him
20. He followed Emma through that portal
21. He got chased by an evil snowman
22. Ingrid almost murdered him with icicles
23. His life belonged to Rumple after the deal he made for his hand
24. He got his heart taken out of his chest
25. Rumple almost killed him by crushing it
26. Ursula tried to drown him
27. THE MAN DIED.
                          
So can you see why I keep watching the scene where he dies over and over again? (Did I miss something?)