| its you... || darling i'd wait, for you |

                                    

                                          
eighteen
"j's lullaby"
Katelyn and Nick arrived back at the house. She still couldn't believe it was hers. She walked in with the monsters and the smell in the house was absolutely awful. 
"Who is trying to burn my house down, Momma." She said with a sigh, seeing her mom still in the same position as usual. 
"Karl and Eli." She replied with a smile. Katelyn sighed with a smile. 
"Kat! Karl and I made you breakfast." He exclaimed, Karl carrying the young boy over who was holding a plate. The food looked absolutely disgusting, but just for Eli she'd eat it. 
"Did you now?" Katelyn asked, looking at it with a fake smile of excitement. She looked at Karl and he shook his head softly, but not enough for Eli to notice. "I'm not very hungry though."
"Of course you are. You wouldn't shut up about it in the car." Nick said, a smirk lighting up his face. 
"Eat it!" Eli said with pure happiness. She nodded and walked to the table, preparing herself to eat a plate full of nasty food. As long as Eli was happy though. 
Katelyn took her first bite, Karl sitting across from her and Eli next to her. Karl wrapped his leg around hers just as she looked up with a face of pure disgust. 
"It's so good Eli. Where'd you learn to cook?" She asked, looking at him as she forced herself to take a bite, swallowing an egg shell with it. 
"Momma." He said, face full of satisfaction. 
"Did you cook Momma a plate?" She asked, looking at her mom. Her mom stifled a laugh and shook her head. 
"Momma was not hungry." Her mom said from the living room. 
"Oh how lovely." Katelyn mumbled. "Why don't you go sit with momma while I finish this." 
Eli ran off and she looked at Karl, shaking her head. The eggs were far too salty and over cooked as well as crunchy. The toast was black. 
"How'd you let him mess toast up." She whispered softly to Karl. He giggled and Katelyn smiled at the sound. 
"So what did you guys even do? Theres a store not even five minutes from here and you were gone half an hour." Karl asked, looking at Nick an Katelyn. 
"We just talked in the car." Katelyn said with a shrug, trying to force herself to take another bite but couldnt. She passed the plate to Chandler who took the spot next to her. 
"I wont eat the toast, but i'll eat the eggs." He said, taking a bite before everyone heard a crunch. Karl laughed and Katelyn stifled a laugh. 
"Karl and I will be back, we're gonna go feed his cat and i'm gonna go change and grab more clothes to bring back here." Katelyn announced, standing up and grabbing Karl. 
"Oh, yeah youre gonna go feed a cat." Nick said, Karl and Katelyn looking at him in disgust. 
"You are a nasty human being." She said, rolling her eyes. Karl's face was bright red in embarrassment as they both walked off. The car ride there was silent but short. 
"What did you and Nick talk about?" He asked, unlocking his front door. 
"My boy problems." She responded with a smile. 
"Oh, you shouldn't have any of those. You're gorgeous, any guy would be happy to have you." He replied with a smile. 
"Surely not, i'm not all that great." 
"There would be a long line waiting outside the door if you ever looked, Katelyn." 
"Oh yeah? And you know this how?" She asked, leaning on the counter in front of him. He leaned on the other side. He just stared at her, admiring her features. Karl decided to make a move, pushing a strand of her hair behind her ear and trailing his fingers down her jawline. She inhaled sharply at the touch, but her eyes never left his. 
"I'm in the line Katelyn, that's how i know." He replied softly. His voice was barely above a whisper, but it was so silent in the house, she heard him as clear as day. 
"You're in the line?" She asked, her voice dropping below a whisper. 
"Of course i am." He said, smiling at her as he retracted his hand. "You just can't see it because you think nobody can love you. But Katelyn, a little tip, just because no male figure in your life properly has loved you, doesnt mean none will." He said softly, his eyes never leaving hers. 
"Karl, i don't even love myself. How can anyone else love me?"
"Once you learn to love yourself, you'll find that youre an easy person to love, Katelyn Foyer."
"How would you know?" 
"Because I fall more in love with you everyday. You dont love yourself, but so many people love you." 
"Why do you love me." 
"Oh if you could see yourself in my eyes, Katelyn." 
"What does that mean?"
"One day, Katelyn, one day you'll truly accept your beauty for what it is. You wont wonder why people love you or why you deserve love. You'll just look in the mirror, and you'll know." 
"So, are you asking me out?" She asked, her heart racing. 
"No, no i'm not Katelyn. I have respect for you. I know you are not in a place in your life right now to be in a relationship. You need to build a relationship with yourself before you can be in one. I'll ask you out when the time is right, when I feel like you can handle yourself and myself. Right now, you can't and that's okay." 
"So you love me but you don't want to date me?" She asked, not understanding what he was saying as her heart was sinking. 
"No, thats not at all what i'm saying."
"What?" 
"Katelyn, i would date you in a heartbeat if i had the chance. I love you, not only as my best friend but in such a way you couldn't handle while working on yourself. You need to focus on the love you give yourself and not to other people."
"Will you be here when i'm ready still?" She asked, voice soft. She couldn't lose Karl, not now. 
"I'd wait forever for you, even if you ask me not to, even if you never ask me to. I would wait a lifetime to call you mine if that's what I get in the end. You, Katelyn, are worth the wait to give my heart to." 
"I'm not ready right now, but i like you a lot i think." 
"I really wish you didn't think, but that's understandable and why I won't ask you to be my girlfriend until you love yourself."
I really wish you didn't think...